Hello beautiful souls!
I just wanted to share my thoughts on the concept of closure-especially in romantic relationships. I have experienced myself as well as heard from many people that felt like they were stuck in a sense (hurt, not able to move forward) because there was no closure from their last relationship.
To be completely honest, I think I used lack of closure as an excuse to leave the door open for certain men in my past. As I matured and evolved it dawned on me that I was setting myself up for emotional upset.
One of my exes and I were doing the same song and dance we had done for years. The one where he says he doesn’t want a commitment but he does “boyfriend things”. He didn’t want me to date anyone. He would even introduce me to other men as his Belle. But whenever I tried to return that same energy, he would emphasize that we were friends. “Best friends”.
And one day, without warning, I just stopped coming around. I stopped communicating with him. Months later, he tried to reenter my life and I told him that I had gotten married. He sarcastically congratulated me and I gave him a facetious ‘thank you’ with a smiley face as a response.
I went on and changed my number after that.
No closure was necessary. I chose to close the door on that situationship myself.
Do not wait for your ex to free you- because they may never do it. They may like the idea of having you around, even though they have no intention of doing right by you.. Sure, an explanation for broken promises or failed relationships would be nice, but realistically, you’re not likely to get what you’re looking for.
And that is how we must regard things moving forward. Closure itself is not a myth; rather the idea of needing closure to move forward. You don’t need another person to heal. All you really need is you. You, your intuition, and the truth.
That is the lesson that I learned. I learned that I didn’t need anyone to heal me, to explain to me, to “fix” me. If I was broken; then I chose to be. I also learned that each person has the right to choose what they want to do with their time and energy. And for whatever reason- or no reason at all- they can choose to stop spending that time and energy with me.
At certain points it was a hard truth to accept, but it has made me stronger and wiser.
So, if you find yourself desiring closure, do yourself a favor and close it on your own. Take an honest look at the relationship. Own the things that you did wrong and learn from them. Decide what you want from your future partner and maintain that standard.
You deserve to live and love without limits. Please don’t limit yourself by living in the past.
Until next time beautiful souls…💜💫
Inner Glow Blog 