What’s Your Story?

Hello Beautiful Souls!

I want to share an experience with you because I found it to be extremely impactful in my life and I hope that it can be impactful for you too.

Some time back, I met a very special individual while networking on Tiktok. I believe that he is one of my tribe because of the way we were drawn to each other. During our first encounter he asked me, “what’s your story?” And I’m not going to lie to you, for some reason, that question had me shook.

I stammered. I saw that he was a life coach as well, and then my insecurities started to rise up on the inside of me. I had been battling a pretty tough case of imposter syndrome during that time. * Is he trying to Coach me? I wondered. But no, that wasn’t it.

Then, my unhealed mistrust for men popped into the forefront of my mind. I asked myself, What’s his angle? What does he want? **

Turns out, he wanted exactly what he asked- to know what my story was.

So, What is my story?

I had a hard time answering that question because for a while I didn’t even know that I had an actual story. I was so focused on the opinions of others, that I had adopted their writings into my story. I was behaving like a victim of circumstance rather than taking ownership of my own life! I had experienced so many painful things and I was embarrassed. I didn’t know how to tell my story without feeling hurt, anger, or shame.

But I learned from Dean Graviosi’s book that there is a negative story and a positive one. The negative story is the one that you may have been taught from influential people in your life or it may be a belief gathered from an unfavorable experience. *** This negative story prevents us from doing what is the truest to us. For me, the upbringing in lack and poverty along with my low self-esteem served as a perfect accelerant for my negative story of not being good enough.

I have been married twice. And I felt inadequate in both marriages. I took on the more traditional role- as I was raised to. I cooked, cleaned, sewed, supported my spouse, and was the best wife and parent that I knew how to be at that time. But I was unhappy and didn’t feel valued. At some point in both marriages, my spouse at the time so much as informed me of my lack of actual value. My first husband claimed that my contributions were so insignificant that I could ‘stand still like a statue’ and the household would still run perfectly without a hitch.

My second husband, who I met while still recovering from my first marriage, went on to say that I had nothing when I met him and that I would continue to have nothing after our separation. After my second marriage imploded, I was left homeless. I took that as confirmation that what my ex-husbands had said about me was true.

But it was not true then and it isn’t true now! That was the negative story that was embedded in me that kept me from going for what I wanted in life. I was stifled by an idea of inadequacy that I had formed based on the opinions of others.

Today, once and for all, I disown and completely eradicate that negative story and I work each and every day to create my true story. My real story is that I am a Powerful, Strong, Smart, Kind, Caring, Leader, Life Coach, Writer, Motivator, and Business Woman who affects positive change everywhere I go. I speak clearly and with purpose to the hearts of people who are hurting because I know what it’s like to suffer in silence and feel like there’s no way out.

You see, my actual story is nothing like the story my exes told. My story is a fabulous one. And it is still being written.