Relinquish my Strength?! Uh, No.

Hello, beautiful souls 💖

I’d like to discuss something that has been tugging on my heart strings lately. Ive noticed that there has been a reel trending on social media about ‘strong black women’. In case you aren’t familiar with it, it goes a little something like this:

I am not a strong black woman. I am delicate, fragile, and I can’t do it all on my own…

There’s more to the reel, and I don’t remember the audio verbatim but I’d like to address the sentiment. I viewed this audio as a cry for help from my queens who are tired of carrying the load alone.

Being strong is a blessing and a curse in today’s society. When a person is strong, they are often given more weight to carry. The growing assumption is that since you’ve carried so much, you can carry a little more…and a bit more…and wait, here’s a little more. People typically don’t check on or offer assistance to strong people. And that can cause even the strongest of people to be weary.

Yet, strength is a gift. It is earned based on perseverance and is the by product of experience and wisdom. Strength is an invaluable attribute that should be celebrated.

I am strong.

I didn’t think of myself as strong at one point. I endured quite a bit of misfortune as well as mistreatment from people I loved and to be honest I felt anything but strong. At times I felt broken, lost, and out of control. And that’s okay too. A strong person doesn’t feel strong all the time. In fact, a person is strong because they go through painful experiences and still stand.

Strength is often appreciated in the hard times. In relationships I was often commended for my strength when I helped my mate with an issue they were facing or found a solution to a problem when my partner didn’t have one. But when I stood up for myself, I was told often that I was “too strong”.

What does that mean?!

The same strength that was admired and appreciated was quickly shunned and viewed as a negative attribute once I established some boundaries. That is not how things work.

That being said, strength is an attribute that I’ve earned and I will not relinquish my strength so that a person will accept me. I am strong, I am soft, I am fierce, I am sweet. I am human. We are human. And we all deserve to be loved and accepted as we are.

Until next time, beautiful souls 💖

You Can Do ANYTHING!

Hello Beautiful Souls 💖

I won’t be before you long- as I’ve heard many men of the cloth say but it was never true. 🤣

I just want to take a few moments to encourage some and remind others of this undisputable fact:

You can do ANYTHING you set your mind to do.

That is an actual fact. Think about that. Understand it. You can literally do anything you set your mind to.. as soon as you take the limits off of yourself. Anything.

Because when you set your mind that means that you are locked in. You are diligent, and you are focused on this thing. You apply time and energy to this thing daily.

And when you do that- the roadblocks crumble.

The obstacles move, and you formulate a way to do that thing in your mind.

And then you go do it. Then, you come back to step one. You focus on something else. Set your mind on it and repeat the process over again.

You can do anything.

So…what are you gonna do?

Feel free to comment and let me know what you plan to do!

Until next time, beautiful souls 💖

Balance

Hi beautiful souls!

As I discover myself anew of this spiritual journey; I realize more and more how important balance is. I just wanted to share a few thoughts on the importance of balance.

Life is about balance. You can’t be completely selfish just as you can’t be completely selfless. If you’re selfish; then you’re constantly taking. Often to the detriment of others. Taking and storing. Taking and storing. And eventually, you fill your vessel to its capacity.

And then what happens?

You become stagnant. There’s a stench. It starts to smell because some of what you continue to hold on to has become useless to you. It’s wasting away.

It now belongs to someone else but you won’t release it. “What about me? What about me? What about me?” Until you’re completely full. You can’t take on any new information or learn any new gifts because you haven’t cultivated anything but yourself. There’s no flow.

On the other hand, if you’re completely selfless, you give and give and give. But then, what becomes of you? You are now ill nourished, miserable, weak, nonfunctional, dried up and probably even bitter because you gave of your entire self without being refilled. You feel used. You have nothing else to give now. There’s no flow. We all need flow. We need that constant movement and exchange of energy to be our best selves. We need balance.

This I know from experience because I was a giver. I would give to spouses, lovers, and boyfriends thinking that they would see how wonderful I was and give back. When they didn’t give back, or didn’t give back equally- it hurt me to my core. Until I met someone else. I was in a self destructive cycle.

I gave and gave until one day I looked around and saw what little there was left of myself. This journey helped me see what I was doing to myself and what I was allowing…

But now I break free!

I share my vulnerability in the hope that it will reach and help someone before they experience this pain. Or perhaps you’re in a similar situation, and this piece may be used to enlighten you and remind you of how wonderful you are- with or without the validation of another person.

Either way; I hope this helps someone.

Until next time beautiful souls… 💜✨ Mimi