Tag: evolution

Use the Power of Choice to Discover your Purpose!

Hello beautiful souls 💖

Do you wonder what your purpose in life is? Do you grow weary of drifting through life feeling unfulfilled? If you feel that way, you aren’t alone.

Determining what our purpose is in life can be one of the hardest questions that we as humans must try to answer. In this blog, we will explore our feelings and options, and by the end, we should have a fairly solid tool to help give our lives a more meaningful direction!

There are three steps to the process of discovering the purpose of your life:

1. Understanding the Principle of Choice.

2. Creating your ‘Underlying Principle’

3. Aligning your Life with this Underlying Principle

Understanding the Principle of Choice

Norman Vincent Peale has this to say about the Power Of Choice: “The greatest power we have is the power of Choice. It is an actual fact, that if you have been groping under unhappiness, you can choose to be joyous instead. And, by effort, lift yourself into joy. If you tend to be fearful, you can overcome that misery by choosing to have courage. The whole trend and the quality of anyone’s life is determined by the choices that are made.”

Choosing is the most important activity of our minds, because by making a choice, we are proclaiming our desires to the subconscious mind. Once the subconscious mind gets to know our desires, it does everything in its power to manifest those desires in our lives. The things the we choose become goals to the subconscious mind. And if we are sincere in pursuing them, there is no reason why we would not accomplish those goals.

Naturally then, it’s reasonable to deduce that indecision prevents us from accomplishing our goals. It not only creates frustration and anxiety; but indecision confuses the subconscious mind about what we want. That is not at all to suggest making snap decisions or behaving impulsively. We should always follow our intuition and make decisions that are in accordance to our true desires and purpose.

A lot of us let others make choices for us, or make choices according to societal norms or cultural stereotypes. Sometimes we make these choices even though they go against our own wishes. We must not make our life decisions based on the desires of other people. What is right for one individual may not be right for another, and the way to know what’s right for you is to listen to what your heart says.

So, to begin the process, make a list of things that interest you. Add things you’ve always enjoyed, things that make you feel better, that inspire you, etc.

Whatever it is that interests you, write it down and answer these questions:

What thing do you love to do?

What is it that you love about that thing, and why?

How could you do this for money, and make a living out of it?

Creating your Underlying Principle

The next step is to examine the list you made and find out if there is a recurring theme. Then, take the central theme of the things you love to do, and try to put it in a short and precise statement. This will be your Mission Statement. It could be a quote by a famous person, or a philosophy that has influenced you. The mission statement doesn’t have to be permanent; it can grow and change as you do. Go ahead and write down your Mission Statement 🙂

Aligning your Life with Your Underlying Principle

Now that you have your Mission Statement, it’s time to map out the path to your ultimate purpose. By implementing small changes and remaining consistent to them, you will begin living out your underlying principle each and every day. By becoming aware and intentional of this underlying principle of your life, you will certainly start to feel the difference in your enthusiasm for life as a whole. Create time and space to bring the things on your list into your life. If you find that you like being in nature, plan a camping trip or visit a national park.

You could even change professions or start a business that more closely aligns with your Mission.

So..there it is!

By following the steps mentioned above, you will be on your way to finding and living out your purpose. And as you go through this process, always remember that –

“You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it courageously. ” – Steve Maraboli

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

Featured

Self-Evaluation

Hello beautiful souls 💖

This week, the focus is on self-evaluation. Self-evaluation is the third (and most pivotal) step in our evolution. Self evaluation, or shadow work, is a process that has brought forth a lot of healing for me on my journey.

Self Evaluation is so important because no real progress can be made without it.

No one can truly show up for themselves; neither can they be intentional without evaluating their behaviors first. Self evaluation enables a person to know their strengths and challenges. Only then can a person truly show up and adequately assess the areas where they should be more intentional.

What does self evaluation really mean?

My interpretation of self evaluation is a combination of self awareness and self discovery. It’s being 100% truthful with myself about my emotions and triggers. When I feel triggered or become frustrated, I immediately ask myself why I am feeling the way that I am. I consider the four agreements- am I breaking one of them? I continue to ask myself questions and evaluating my emotions and responses until I find the root of the problem.

Sometimes, my evaluation goes deeper than a few self check questions and I take a more extensive approach that involves journaling and meditation.

Each step in the Evolution process works together to ensure our progression into greatness. Self evaluation eventually leads to self mastery- a beautiful level of elevation that I am still striving to reach.

The process of evaluating ourselves may be uncomfortable at times, but it is definitely worth it! This brings up our vibration as well as prevents us from repeating painful lessons.

Whatever method of self-evaluation you use,(journaling, meditation, prayer, hobbies and activities, therapy, etc) I wish you well on your evolution.

Please feel free to reach out if you have any questions, and/or comment if you have tips or suggestions to add to this topic. 🙂

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

Be Intentional

Hello beautiful souls 💖

This week is all about the second step in The Evolution to our best selves: Be Intentional.

(Step one was last week’s topic: Show Up For Yourself!)

To be intentional is to be mindful of your thoughts, aware of your actions, and to be deliberate with your time and energy. In short, being intentional means that your actions have a specific aim or purpose.

Here are some tips for being intentional:

1. Prioritize tasks

2. Create a schedule

3. Set boundaries

4. Form good habits

An accountability partner may also be useful if you find yourself losing motivation.

If you’d like some suggestions or have any that you’d like to add, feel free to comment and let me know!

Next week, we will be talking about the third step in the ongoing process of evolution: Self Evaluation.

Always remember; you are heard, you are loved, you are seen.

Until next time beautiful souls 💖💖

Sexy

Hello beautiful souls 💖

Today I felt inspired! So much so, that I’m posting my blog early this week.

Some of you may already know that I am currently writing two books. One of them is a book of poetry and the other is a book about my personal journey. While I was writing this morning, I had some thoughts that I wanted to share.

Excerpt from my upcoming book:

I never thought of myself as sexy. When men asked me to ‘do something sexy’ I always would cringe on the inside. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what was sexy. I couldn’t recognize myself as sexy, and I didn’t know how to emulate it because I’d never felt it before. I didn’t think I could be sexy. Isn’t that against the rules? I was brought up a certain way. Christian girls aren’t sexy. They are holy. They are good. I thought I had to be good; and by default that meant that I could not be sexy.

I was made to believe that kind or ‘righteous’ souls are not sexy or provocative because that is lustful behavior. And lustful behavior will send you right to the pits of hell…I tried to be what I thought was good…

I had put too much pressure on myself to be someone else’s depiction of perfect. I had become helpful to the point of my own detriment, and submissive to the point of utter foolishness. In time, I became depressed and resigned. I was his doormat.

As I reflect on how poor my morale and my self image was at that time in my life; I can’t help but be extremely grateful for the progress that I’ve made. This journey of mine is on-going. I work on loving myself and affirming positivity into my life daily. I am honest with myself and take ownership of all of me-even the parts of me that still need work. Especially those parts.

That’s the beauty of this journey for me: discovering that I can be kind and sexy, vulnerable and powerful, whimsical and wise. I can be exactly who I am.

And I love it here.

Until next time, beautiful souls 💖

Strawberries

Hello beautiful souls 💖

I was thinking about a meme that I saw on Instagram some time ago. It said something to the degree of ‘you could be the juiciest, sweetest strawberry in the world. There’s still gonna be some people that don’t like strawberries. And it hit me.

Again.

This is information that I already knew, but at the time I needed to be reminded. Sometimes self depreciating thoughts and ego creep in and try to cause me to revert back to my old ways.

I’m still relatively new to this stage in my life where I speak and think freely without fear of rejection or repercussions. The stage where the best isn’t yet to come; the best is here and now because I create it with my mind. I am here. In this beautiful stage where I dare to be my happiest and most authentic. I dare to be who I am- unabashed.

And this stage has become a permanent place.

I am grateful to have reached this place in my life where I finally realize that I can be myself. I live in a liberating state where I don’t feel the need to explain how and why strawberries are awesome. I find joy and solace in who I am. I love my uniqueness. And the dislike or disapproval of others does not change that.

I am a sweet, juicy strawberry. Not everyone likes strawberries.

And that’s okay.

To all my other strawberries out there; stay sweet!

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

The Ultimate Goal

Hello beautiful souls 💖

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately in regards to my goals. As I grow and evolve, I find it imperative to not only identify my desires, but to set a plan in motion to obtain the things that I desire.

So, I asked myself what my goals are and even what my ultimate goal is. This is what I came up with:

The ultimate goal for me is to feel high without stimulants. To “get high” at will. I’d like to achieve a state of elevation and remain there. Additionally, I want to open and balance my crown Chakra and experience nirvana. For a moment I questioned myself. I wondered if my ultimate goal was perhaps a bit lofty. After some thought I decided that I’d rather live my life trying to obtain it than to prematurely count myself out.

I then formulated a plan to discover and experience my own bliss. I found that the key to nirvana for me is expansion. In order to expand, I must dare to step out of the predictable and the ordinary, and take that leap of faith into the exciting, creative, bold…intoxicating even!

I cannot settle for a dull existence. I will not resign to working a job that I absolutely hate just to pay my bills. Although I know I have to make a living, I will make the time to build the life that I want. The point of this human experience is to bound boldly and fearlessly out of mediocrity and explore the possibilities of life. And then take those possibilities and make them realities.. A reality where I love and live without limits and encourage others to do the same.

My goal is to be worry free- to be fearless. To appreciate life..to be grateful for who I am and what I have.. to spread love, passion, fire…To lose control sometimes and not always go with the safest choice. Not to be irresponsible or wreckless- but to be okay with not knowing how every day will end because somehow I know that life will be beautiful and superb. That is my ultimate goal.

And that is my hope and dream for you as well. For you to achieve your ultimate goal. There is room and time and space for each and every one of us to experience our own nirvana. Complete and utter bliss. We just have to dare to step put of our comfort zones.

I am stepping out. Who’s coming with me? 😉

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

Celebrate!

Hello beautiful souls 💖

During this time of year and this point in my life I find it to be of vital importance to celebrate.

I didn’t allow myself to celebrate much before.  I felt that I hadn’t accomplished  anything worth celebrating- except for create my daughter- and I didn’t do even do that on my own.

I realized that my way of thinking in the past was not only negative, but it was ungrateful. Self evaluation proved that I had been choosing to see my life and experiences as some sort of punishment or rejection by “God”. I felt like I was being picked on; bullied. My perspective was completely damaging. I was grading myself based on outside expectations and popular clichés and comparing myself to my peers.

Over the years, I have learned and evolved much. I have looked into my past and separated the pain from the lessons. I have begun to truly know, love, and appreciate myself. I find that life is much more simple and enjoyable when I stop overthinking or worrying and just live.

Live and Celebrate.

Celebrate!

I celebrate each day that I am given. I celebrate my gifts and talents, my empathy and kindness, my body, my experiences, my wisdom, my sensuality, my intelligence, my uniqueness…

I celebrate me.

And you should celebrate yourself as well.

Let’s Celebrate!

Until next time beautiful souls ✨ 💖

Hair Evolution

Hi!

Today marks a special day in my hair evolution. Hair evolution, you say? Yes! Yes I do.

For some people “it’s just hair”. But in my opinion, my hair is a crown. It is a form of self expression that I handled (and sometimes mishandled) in different ways.

As a child, my mother styled my hair. She would do braids and beads which I loved for both the color and the clacking sound they made. She also did twisted ponytails with barrettes at the ends. I loved this too, but I had to play more carefully for fear of losing my hair ornaments.

And then I was “old enough” to do my own hair. Oh, the independence! I thought of all the wonderful and courageous styles that I would come up with. But when my time came to style my own hair, I didn’t do such a great job.

I used relaxers and far too much heat. I was trying to have my hair ‘bone straight’ as they used to say. I suffered from split ends and breakage. So then, I went to my next hairstyle- braided extensions.

This style became my comfort zone. While it did lend versatility and protection for my hair, I became too reliant on it. Even when my hair was healthy again, and had grown; I still continued to wear them. After many years, I realized that I was hiding behind them. It gave me a length and texture that I didn’t naturally have at that time.

One of my looks…box braids.

Years ago, after my lupus diagnosis, I suffered from an extreme episode of hair loss. It came out one day in the shower. I still remember it like it was yesterday! Massive clumps of my hair were splattering on the floor of my bathtub. I was devastated. And it look away the little bit of confidence that I felt like I had.

Momentarily…

After that devastation, I actually felt liberated! I came to realize that it was just hair. No big deal. It’ll grow back. I said to myself. (And it did!) But with that new realization, I was open to do something different. Something so not me. I had it cut!

I was feeling myself that day!

This haircut was everything! My sister is a cosmetologist and she gave me the initial look…which evolved into what you see above and other derivatives of that. I felt so exciting, edgy, sexy. I felt brand new.

…but after a few years of the short style, I was ready to move on. I felt really proud and empowered by the natural hair movement- especially when my sister and daughter chose to “go natural”. If they could do it; so could I. So I did.

I stopped using harsh chemicals and heat on my hair and began to just let it grow. Naps and all! But it was okay, because I was infatuated with the magic of the Afro.

Over two years into my natural hair journey, (and one year ago today) I decided to take the evolution one step further. And guess what? I locked my hair! For a moment I doubted it; thinking, is this really the last hair style I want to have?

I decided that the benefits outweigh any risks and I have no regrets. I can still add braided extensions for variety if I want, and sometimes I do. But I am really enjoying cultivating my hair with our oils and watching it grow. My hair is evolving as I evolve and it’s a beautiful thing.

May 2020. May 2021.

So, happy “loc-iversary” to me!

Much love to those of you reading…be blessed. Be free.