Be Impeccable with Your Word!

Hello beautiful souls 💖

Today, I just wanted to touch bases with you and remind you of the power of your words. As humans, we have been gifted with a power that no other creature on earth has: we are able to speak.

This is a gift and with our words we can build or tear down, bless someone or curse them.

We as people can sometimes be brazen when we speak to others. Sometimes we get angry and say the first thing that comes to our minds without any regard to the damage that we may cause.

I just finished reading an awesome book called The Four Agreements. If you haven’t read it; I recommend that you do.

The First Agreement of the four is Be Impeccable with Your Word. I define impeccable as ‘on point’, deliberate, careful, intentional. According to the book, impeccable quite literally means “without sin.” To be impeccable with your word means to speak carefully and be sure to not “sin” against yourself or others.

When we speak negative words or things with ill intent, we literally send out poison to ourselves and the people around us. These words can create strongholds or agreements that we are obligated to live by until the agreement is broken.

For Example: A single mother is tired after a long day of work. All she wants to do is take off her shoes and relax, but she just found out that her son got involved in a situation at school that requires her attention. She goes and picks up her son from school and they head home. During the ride, the frustrated mother tells her son that he’s a really bad kid and that he always causes problems.

The little boy accepted his mother’s words as factual. He has now made an agreement with himself that he is a really bad kid that always causes problems. Ten years later, the little boy is in high school. He often receives disciplinary action at school and is on the verge of being expelled. His mother doesn’t understand why her son behaves this way.

It was her words that presented a verbal contract and without knowing any better, the little boy accepted it. He has an agreement- an obligation to always cause problems just as his mother said all those years ago. This will continue unless the boy accepts a different agreement. It takes work, but agreements can be broken.

Wouldn’t it just be better if we mind our mouths from the beginning?

Well…we don’t have the beginning. It’s gone forever. But we do have now. We can be kinder now. We can be loving now. We can be intentional now.

We can be impeccable with our word now.

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

The Ultimate Goal

Hello beautiful souls 💖

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately in regards to my goals. As I grow and evolve, I find it imperative to not only identify my desires, but to set a plan in motion to obtain the things that I desire.

So, I asked myself what my goals are and even what my ultimate goal is. This is what I came up with:

The ultimate goal for me is to feel high without stimulants. To “get high” at will. I’d like to achieve a state of elevation and remain there. Additionally, I want to open and balance my crown Chakra and experience nirvana. For a moment I questioned myself. I wondered if my ultimate goal was perhaps a bit lofty. After some thought I decided that I’d rather live my life trying to obtain it than to prematurely count myself out.

I then formulated a plan to discover and experience my own bliss. I found that the key to nirvana for me is expansion. In order to expand, I must dare to step out of the predictable and the ordinary, and take that leap of faith into the exciting, creative, bold…intoxicating even!

I cannot settle for a dull existence. I will not resign to working a job that I absolutely hate just to pay my bills. Although I know I have to make a living, I will make the time to build the life that I want. The point of this human experience is to bound boldly and fearlessly out of mediocrity and explore the possibilities of life. And then take those possibilities and make them realities.. A reality where I love and live without limits and encourage others to do the same.

My goal is to be worry free- to be fearless. To appreciate life..to be grateful for who I am and what I have.. to spread love, passion, fire…To lose control sometimes and not always go with the safest choice. Not to be irresponsible or wreckless- but to be okay with not knowing how every day will end because somehow I know that life will be beautiful and superb. That is my ultimate goal.

And that is my hope and dream for you as well. For you to achieve your ultimate goal. There is room and time and space for each and every one of us to experience our own nirvana. Complete and utter bliss. We just have to dare to step put of our comfort zones.

I am stepping out. Who’s coming with me? 😉

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

Follow Up/Reach Out

Hello beautiful souls 💖

Today, I wanted to do a follow up blog based on last week’s post. Last week’s post was a poem that I had written; entitled Can’t Find Happy.

While I was typing those words that I had written a few years back, I could recall the depth of sadness and misery that I was feeling when I originally wrote it. During that time, I was fighting with everything I had to salvage my marriage and make my family happy.

The man that I loved was unhappy. And although I was also unhappy, I put myself on the back burner and focused on him. No matter how hard I focused on his happiness, he seemed to always find something to be unhappy about. In turn, I became even more unhappy. This deep sadness had become depression.

I was an unaware, ill-equipped empath who was codependent and had trauma bonded with a narcissist. My environment was toxic. My self esteem was at an all time low due to being constantly manipulated and gaslighted, and I didn’t believe that I could leave and do well on my own. I felt trapped. I felt broken. And I felt oh so lost.

Can’t Find Happy was written in efforts to release my depression and despair through writing. Depression is very real and should be taken very seriously. It is a legitimate illness that has chemical effects on the brain and the body.

It isn’t always easy to spot, (some people who battle depression are very good at hiding their inner turmoil) but if you notice a change in behavior in a friend or loved one Please Follow Up with them! If they seem uncharacteristically moody, withdrawn, easily flustered, distracted, or lethargic, these may be indications that something is wrong. Follow Up with them. Show them that you care! Compassion is free.

And if you, beautiful soul; feel any of the previously mentioned symptoms. If you feel like you’re carrying a burden that is too heavy for you- Please reach out!

**There are people that care!

I care.

And things may seem heavy and hopeless now, but you can make it out of that situation. I was in a situation that I thought was hopeless and I made it through.

I was depressed, but I made it.

I was manipulated, but I made it.

I was broken, but I made it.

I was gaslighted, but I made it.

I was doubted, but I made it.

I was afraid, but I made it.

I made it.

I made it!!

And so can you.

And so will you.

And so ARE you.

A post from the narcissistic abuse support group I’m in…

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

Complete

Hello beautiful souls 💖

Today, there is so much gratitude and joy in my heart as I see a painful cycle of my life coming to a close.

Over the past few much I have endured much. Some of it good, some…not so much, but I learned a lesson from every experience. And that, today is what I want to focus on.

It’s easy to feel good and be happy when things are going well. But it’s during those times of learning, unfamiliarity, and sometimes even betrayal that have the most growth and rewards come from them.

And during this time, is when I really learned how strong I am. I had been put in a strange and difficult position and there was no one to depend on but me. This is not to say, of course that no one was there for me. There were/are a few very special and very supportive people in my small circle that gave me words of encouragement and showed me kindness.

But when the rubber meets the road, if a person wants change, only they can do that for themselves. I had spent so much time doubting myself…I couldn’t do that anymore. I had to make something happen. There were people depending on me. I was depending on me.

I pulled myself together and started writing my goals down. I started meditating more, I wrote new affirmations and my confidence began to grow. I had no choice but to believe in myself.

It didn’t happen overnight, but things began to change. Once my perspective changed work got a bit easier and I saw the good in my situation.

And now I’m actually quite grateful for that betrayal because it set me free. It helped me see myself truly. I learned that I already am and have what I need.

I am complete within myself.

And so are you.

Until next time beautiful souls 💖

Celebrate!

Hello beautiful souls 💖

During this time of year and this point in my life I find it to be of vital importance to celebrate.

I didn’t allow myself to celebrate much before. I felt that I hadn’t accomplished anything worth celebrating- except for create my daughter- and I didn’t do even do that on my own.

I realized that my way of thinking in the past was not only negative, but it was ungrateful. Self evaluation proved that I had been choosing to see my life and experiences as some sort of punishment or rejection by “God”. I felt like I was being picked on; bullied. My perspective was completely damaging. I was grading myself based on outside expectations and popular clichés and comparing myself to my peers.

Over the years, I have learned and evolved much. I have looked into my past and separated the pain from the lessons. I have begun to truly know, love, and appreciate myself. I find that life is much more simple and enjoyable when I stop overthinking or worrying and just live.

Live and Celebrate.

Celebrate!

I celebrate each day that I am given. I celebrate my gifts and talents, my empathy and kindness, my body, my experiences, my wisdom, my sensuality, my intelligence, my uniqueness…

I celebrate me.

And you should celebrate yourself as well.

Let’s Celebrate!

Until next time beautiful souls ✨ 💖

Stop Overthinking!

Hello beautiful souls!

I had an uncomfortable conversation with someone that I care about and it led me to the topic of this blog.

He pointed out that I am an “overthinker” and went on to say that having a conversation with me is hard sometimes because I put too much thought into my responses…

And it hurt.

Initially, I got upset. I was offended. Wow. I thought to myself. Did he just say that talking to me is hard? I could’ve responded that if talking to me was so difficult, then he could simply stop talking to me. But that would’ve been an egotistical response said out of negative emotions that I was feeling. I didn’t want that.

Instead, I took some time after the call to process and evaluate what was said. And there are still aspects of the conversation that do not resonate with me (I discarded those) but I found what he said to be true.

I do tend to overthink. I knew that before he said it. But what I didn’t understand was; why?

And now I know.

Overthinking is the byproduct of fear and self doubt. I had made decisions and said things in the past that led to such painful experiences, that I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t trust myself to say what I wanted to say exactly as I wanted to say it, I didn’t trust myself to do and be what I wanted to do and be because I had never done it before.

There was always someone or something holding me back.

I thought it was parents, Peers, teachers, the military, significant others, people on social media…

But after further review; I realized that the “someone” was me. And while it’s true that people didn’t respond well to things that I did and said, I had to come to grips with the fact that I am not responsible for another person’s reaction. Their truth and my truth may not be the same.

In addition to that, some of the past decisions I made that didn’t fare well were made from the ego and misinformation.

Overthinking only leads to procrastination, discomfort, anxiety, fear, complacency, and a myriad of other negative emotions and setbacks. Overthinking keeps us from living our best lives and being our most elevated selves. It prevents action and promotes mediocrity. Some people overthink to prevent making a decision not realizing that overthinking is a decision. It’s just not a favorable one.

Currently when faced with a decision; I consider these things: 1. I make sure that I am aligned with my inner wisdom. 2. I do not prioritize the opinions/reactions of others over my own.

Now that I am considering those two things with every decision, I can move forward in confidence.

This change is quite necessary in order for me to fulfill my calling and destiny in life. I cannot help or inspire others if I overthink and constantly live in my head.

And the change may not happen overnight. But I am putting this knowledge to work and developing a new practice.

So, the next time you’re faced with a decision and it’s time to take action, take a moment to think, but don’t let yourself be consumed by overthinking.

Do not let fear overtake you.

Everything is going to be okay.

From one recovering overthinker to another: trust yourself.

Until next time beautiful souls… 💜💫💜

Today is Ready!

Hi, it’s Mimi!

I just wanted to take a moment of your time. Lately, I’ve really been impressed to talk about the importance of time. What I want for myself and for you is to make the most out of each day. So the message of today (and every day) is…

Today is Ready.

Today is ready to see what you’ll do with it. It has some great ideas, but you’re in charge. You take the lead.

Everyday we are given is an opportunity to do something we’ve never done or be someone we’ve never been. To grow. To evolve. Every day. Every moment. And you cannot allow anyone to restrict you or hold you to yesterday! You are not your past. You are now.

And it doesn’t matter what your past is, as long as you’ve correctly taken ownership of it, processed it, and are actively moving forward. You are not frozen in time. You are not shackled to your past. You’re not!

The moment you speak up, the moment you decide, the moment you take action- that is the exact moment that you become new. You become present.

And the present is the only time there is! When yesterday ended, so ended the opportunity to change it. It is set and it is done. It’s gone. Whether you let yesterday lift you up, or you chose to bring yesterday down- it is of no consequence because today you can choose to go another direction.

Trying to relive the past only results in a waste of precious resources- your time and energy- and a failed attempt to adjust or recreate a day that has already done its job. The energy was there, the seed was planted, the lesson was made available; or what have you.

Yesterday is finished. Take yesterday’s lessons and move on. Because today is here and today wants to do something else.

Today wants to break generational curses, today wants to introduce you to your twin flame. Or maybe today wants to give you a promotion, a new business idea, or your newly built dream home. But you’re so stuck in the past that you can’t get to it!

You’ve been reliving the day you got fired, cheated on, or divorced for ten years now.

And it’s time to let yesterday go.

It’s time.

Today is ready for you to let yesterday go.

It’s time to let it go.

Let it go.

Much love until next time beautiful souls. Love and Light- Mimi 💜✨

Hair Evolution

Hi!

Today marks a special day in my hair evolution. Hair evolution, you say? Yes! Yes I do.

For some people “it’s just hair”. But in my opinion, my hair is a crown. It is a form of self expression that I handled (and sometimes mishandled) in different ways.

As a child, my mother styled my hair. She would do braids and beads which I loved for both the color and the clacking sound they made. She also did twisted ponytails with barrettes at the ends. I loved this too, but I had to play more carefully for fear of losing my hair ornaments.

And then I was “old enough” to do my own hair. Oh, the independence! I thought of all the wonderful and courageous styles that I would come up with. But when my time came to style my own hair, I didn’t do such a great job.

I used relaxers and far too much heat. I was trying to have my hair ‘bone straight’ as they used to say. I suffered from split ends and breakage. So then, I went to my next hairstyle- braided extensions.

This style became my comfort zone. While it did lend versatility and protection for my hair, I became too reliant on it. Even when my hair was healthy again, and had grown; I still continued to wear them. After many years, I realized that I was hiding behind them. It gave me a length and texture that I didn’t naturally have at that time.

Years ago, after my lupus diagnosis, I suffered from an extreme episode of hair loss. It came out one day in the shower. I still remember it like it was yesterday! Massive clumps of my hair were splattering on the floor of my bathtub. I was devastated. And it look away the little bit of confidence that I felt like I had.

Momentarily…

After that devastation, I actually felt liberated! I came to realize that it was just hair. No big deal. It’ll grow back. I said to myself. (And it did!) But with that new realization, I was open to do something different. Something so not me. I had it cut!

This haircut was everything! My sister is a cosmetologist and she gave me the initial look…which evolved into what you see above and other derivatives of that. I felt so exciting, edgy, sexy. I felt brand new.

…but after a few years of the short style, I was ready to move on. I felt really proud and empowered by the natural hair movement- especially when my sister and daughter chose to “go natural”. If they could do it; so could I. So I did.

I stopped using harsh chemicals and heat on my hair and began to just let it grow. Naps and all! But it was okay, because I was infatuated with the magic of the Afro.

Over two years into my natural hair journey, (and one year ago today) I decided to take the evolution one step further. And guess what? I locked my hair! For a moment I doubted it; thinking, is this really the last hair style I want to have?

I decided that the benefits outweigh any risks and I have no regrets. I can still add braided extensions for variety if I want, and sometimes I do. But I am really enjoying cultivating my hair with our oils and watching it grow. My hair is evolving as I evolve and it’s a beautiful thing.

So, happy “loc-iversary” to me!

Much love to those of you reading…be blessed. Be free.