Life’s 3 Mandates

Why are we here??

Hey Boo!

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting lately on where I am in life, the steps that I need to take to get where I want to go, and I began to think of life in general. What is the purpose of it all? Why are we even here?

I believe that we all have a purpose and path that is unique to us, but within that purpose there are three mandates that we must achieve in order to be truly happy.

Mandate #1: Be Authentic

Being authentic means being true to yourself and being true to yourself requires an understanding and knowledge of self that can only be gained through honest self-evaluation. You cannot be true to yourself without first admitting the truth about yourself.

Being authentic is boldly standing in your own uniqueness, learning and growing while sharing your unique light with the world. Authenticity can be challenging – especially in this day and age- with the existence of so many rules, traditions, obligations, and expectations. Let’s not forget the ever present ‘internet gangsters’ with their relentless opinions.

Remember that this life is yours to live and that being your authentic self should not bother or hurt people in your life that truly love you. Being your authentic self will improve quality of life not only for you, but for the people around you.

The mandate of being authentic brings more purity and honesty into the world and challenges others to be authentic as well.

Mandate #2: Be Creative

This is a fantastic mandate because it involves us expressing ourselves through creativity. Everyone has at least one creative gift. Whether it’s singing or dancing, writing, teaching, building, coaching, inspiring, helping, painting, or anything else your gift is not only valuable to you but to others as well. Your creative gift is a remedy to someone’s ailment and joy to their soul, so you are actually obligated to share your creative gift with all who appreciate it. Creative gifts were meant to be given, to be shared, and to be celebrated.

So, stop holding back and share your creative gift with the world. You won’t regret it!

The mandate of being creative brings more imagination and freedom into the world and inspires others to be creative as well.

Mandate #3: Love Unconditionally

As much as I enjoy authenticity and creativity, love has to be my absolute favorite mandate. I feel that love is vital to the human experience and powers everything. It is the one thing in this world that every human must truly feel, express, and experience to really feel alive and fulfilled.

Although we often tend to think of romantic love when love is mentioned, the love that I am referring to is love that must first start with the self. Self-awareness, self-acceptance, and then self-love allows us to access the richest form of love there is which is unconditional. This is the type of love that says, ‘I love you for who you are. I recognize your divinity and I appreciate your light.’ Once you are able to say those words to yourself and mean them, you have mastered a great feat and are equipped with an unstoppable force.

So, dare to open your heart. Search yourself for understanding and acceptance so that you can acquire a love that floods your soul and makes your heart sing.

The mandate of love brings more joy and hope into the world and heals others so that they can love unconditionally as well.

That’s all I have for today Boo. Remember that the month of May will kick off my 5 for 50% off promotion for my Inner Glow Complete and Inner Glow Deluxe coaching packages. The Inner Glow program can help you get unstuck, discover your purpose, and create a plan of action to make things happen. The Inner Glow Deluxe program provides all of those things as well as additional sessions and modules that deal specifically with the effects of narcissistic abuse. If you know that you would greatly benefit from one my coaching program, you should most definitely reach out and schedule a free consultation. My program is affordable and payment plans are available.

Until Next time Beautiful Soul, keep Glowing…

The 3 Biggest Mistakes People Make Before Hiring a Coach

Hey Boo!

If you think the best way or the only way for you to achieve your goals is to do it by yourself then you have Lone Ranger Mentality. While there are some things that we must do independently, we as humans were not created to be independent, rather we should be interdependent. That being said, if you try to do it on your own and find that you need some help then you are well within your right to ask for assistance. Do you believe that reaching out to someone for help somehow indicates that you aren’t enough? That it somehow means you’re incapable and not smart enough, strong enough or good enough?

Well, let me assure you, the people who come to coaching are all of those things, extremely capable, smart, strong and a whole lot more. They choose coaching because they are ready to accelerate their personal or professional lives and work with a professional who will empower them to achieve their goals faster, easier and with better results than they could on their own.

A coach will facilitate your self-discovery, the identification of your goals and the prioritization of those goals. Your coach will help you create your action plan as well as prepare for and overcome any challenges you encounter along the way. Your coach will hold you accountable for taking consistent action toward the realization of your goals. Accountability is one of the greatest payoffs of coaching. It is so powerful because it can make all the difference in terms of you being a Goal Achiever instead of just a Goal Setter and someone who walks the walk instead of someone who is talking the talk. Think of your coach as your success partner, whose reason for being is to help you get what you want quicker, easier and with better results than you could on your own.

If you’re thinking your life is good and you’re relatively satisfied, congratulations! That did not happen on its own. You have obviously done some fabulous work. You’ve already proven you’re the kind of person who proactively goes after what you want, and you get it. So why would you settle for anything less than great? Why would you settle for a muted life when you could amplify your existence and live out loud? Do you really want to play it safe and stay comfortable? Playing it safe and staying comfortable can take you no further than average.

Common Misconception: only people whose lives are a mess get coaches. That’s actually not true at all. It is not uncommon for some clients to be people who have previously achieved success with coaching in the past. Now that they’ve personally experienced the power of coaching, they realize just how much less they were settling for, for themselves and their lives. They were settling for good when they could have been experiencing great. Coaching can dramatically increase the quality of their lives in all areas, from increased sales to enhanced relationships and from better health to increased productivity. After coaching they feel, many for the very first time, that they are fully and vibrantly alive. Glowing, if you will.

So, we challenge those of you who are settling. We challenge you to stop settling for good. We challenge you to go for GREAT and beyond with coaching.

Do you have dreams or desires that you’ve left unfulfilled because you can’t imagine bringing them to life without adding a lot more to your already jam-packed schedule?

It may surprise you to know that coaching can enable you to be more, do more and have more by working smarter instead of harder. Your coach will lead you through an efficient process. You’ll begin by getting crystal clear about what you do and do not want in your life. What’s great about that is that when you figure out the things in your life that you’re tolerating or doing just because you feel like you should, you can create a lot of extra space in your schedule to tackle the things that are truly meaningful to you. Next, you will develop an action plan that details what it’s going to take, ‘the what by when’, for you to reach your goals. Finally, you will stay focused and on track by being accountable to your coach for taking consistent action and you will learn how to overcome any challenges that come up along the way.

Do you find yourself wishing other people were different; easier to get along with, more positive, more successful, trustworthy, or kind? Or do you find yourself thinking about how your life would be better if your circumstances were different if only you had a better job, more money, more time or more opportunity? Are you telling yourself that these external factors are responsible for what’s not working in your life or for preventing you from having what you want?

It can be very tempting to get caught up in this paradigm. But the reality is that if you are looking for or waiting for something outside of yourself to change and give you what you want, you will be waiting and frustrated for a very long time.

The reason for this is that you do not have control over anything outside of you. What you do have, though, is total control over yourself. You have total control over your thoughts, your actions, and your results.

It is a fact that your circumstances will change when you make a committed decision to do the things that will move you in the direction of what you want to experience in your life, and then do them. Hiring a coach is one of the smartest things you can do to ensure you take control and create the reality you want to experience.

The Third Biggest Mistake – Wasting your time and money on stuff that doesn’t get you the results you want and is not ultimately fulfilling.

Let’s face it; there are an infinite number of things that you can spend your hard earned money and valuable time on these days. When you know you want things to be different or better it’s easy for you to waste your time and your money in one of two ways.

The first one is spending your time and money collecting information that comes in the form of books, software, seminars, reports or programs. You are collecting information that you believe can help you get what you want.

Now don’t get the wrong idea here, information is a great thing. I am a huge believer in books and programs being critical tools in helping you get where you want to go, but I want to make something very clear here.

Information alone will not get you results. You cannot expect that your sales will automatically increase just because you read the Guru of Sales latest book and you can’t assume that your monthly expenses will automatically organize themselves just because you purchased the newest expenses tracking software. You will get fulfilling results only by taking consistent action toward achieving your goals based on what you’ve learned from the information you’ve collected.

You may also be wasting your time and money by acquiring and participating in things that have nothing to do with, and even go against you having what you really want. (Example: investing in a new side hustle instead of completing your business launch.)

Have you ever allowed a month to go by where you indulge every food craving you had and did not exercise regularly, even though your deepest desire is to achieve and maintain a healthy body weight and lifestyle? Have you ever gone out and bought some expensive new technology you don’t really need or can’t really afford when what you truly desire is to feel successful and experience financial freedom?

If this sounds like you then you know what it’s like to be running on the hamster wheel of short term gain, in the form of immediate gratification, leading you to long term pain because your life experiences don’t match up with what you really want.

It’s very important to realize that spending your time or money on things that give you immediate gratification but have nothing to do with your goals and values will always leave you feeling empty. Completely and totally empty and looking for the next burst of short-term gratification.

Instead of wasting your time and money, why not invest in yourself in a way that will accelerate your personal and professional development? Working with a coach on an ongoing basis is the most time and cost-effective investment you can make in yourself and your quality of life.

Your coach can teach you how to make the most of what you’ve got and how to do more with less. Your coach will hold you accountable for taking consistent purposeful action towards achieving your goals.

By working with a coach, you will get crystal clear on what you really want, why you want it and how to get it. Having clarity takes the guesswork out of things. That way, you will be able to evaluate all future investment opportunities, and by that I mean any and all opportunities for you to spend your time or money, according to the coach’s ability to support you in fulfilling your purpose, your vision, your values and your goals.

The Second Biggest Mistake – Waiting for a “good” time to make a change or go after the things you really want in life.

Guess what, there is no good time. Life will always be busy. There will always be family and business obligations to attend to, errands to run, chores to do, podcasts and reels to watch and people and projects that want your time, energy and money. Your life will always be busy and it will always get in the way of what you really want, if you let it.

Wondering what you can do about it? You can focus on the simple truth. Today. Stop kidding yourself that the perfect time is just around the corner or some time in the future at some unspecified date. Instead, decide to connect with a professional who can teach you how to make the most of every moment starting right now.

Your coach will hold you accountable while keeping you focused and on track to achieving your goals no matter what life throws at you.

The Biggest Mistake – Telling yourself you can’t afford a coach.

The truth is that you can’t afford not to have one. Coaches are highly in demand these days because coaching has proven itself to be an extremely effective method for facilitating personal and professional development and fulfillment.

The word is out everywhere, it’s on social media, it’s in corporations and it’s in solid and thriving communities. The word is out that coaching makes sense and it really works. In studies that have been done on the impact of coaching, the results have consistently shown a return on investment of more than 100%.

Coaching clients from all walks and areas of life consistently report that it is the best money they ever spent because their investment in an ongoing coaching partnership enables them to achieve their goals. What’s even better is coaching enables them to achieve their goals quicker, easier and with better results. Now think about that for a moment. Think about what that means for you. Anything you want is available to you quicker, easier and with better results through the vehicle of coaching.

If you are still unsure, consider this, it’s not enough for you to say you want things to be different. Just wanting something doesn’t make it so. You must make a decision and then take purposeful action toward what you want. When you put your money where your mouth is and invest in a coaching program you demonstrate your commitment to achieving the thing that you want and at the same time you cut yourself off from any possibility other than total success. Some coaches like myself have affordable payment plans for their coaching programs and would be happy to discuss options with you.

Oh! One more thing before I go. In the month of May, I will be running a special promotion for my new 12 week transformational coaching program. 25 slots. 50% off. I will be providing more information on that in the coming weeks, but feel free to reach out to me if that’s something you’re interested in.

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, keep Glowing…

The Ultimate Success Formula

Hey Boo!

Do you know what it takes to be successful?

I’m sure that if you ask around, you will find different definitions of success and different answers to the formula of success. The truth is, success leaves clues and you can achieve success in the area you desire by observing the common qualities and principles. They are simple and considered to be common sense but many people simply do not follow them.

Let me share with you one of my favorite quotes:

“There are no secrets to success. It is the results of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure.” -Colin Powell

As stated in that quote, there are three key factors to achieve massive success in your life:

Preparation

You don’t have to wait for everything to be perfect. Start with the first step and keep moving. Success doesn’t happen overnight. Prepare, prepare, prepare. You must be ready to receive the success you desire. Set your sight to the destination that you want to achieve, then work and prepare for the moment when the opportunity knocks your door. As one of my mentors once said to me, “it’s better to be prepared and not have the opportunity than to have the opportunity and not be prepared.”

Hard Work

Success needs hard work. Don’t listen to these ‘get rich quick’ schemes. You need to build your character and work hard on yourself and your business to achieve greatness. By ‘hard work’ what I mean is consistent, intentional work. Do the right things and do them in the right way. Don’t procrastinate. Take bold actions. Work with determination to craft your legacy.

Learning from failure

Successful people do not see failures as failures. They see them as important learning lessons. Lessons that are capable of giving them insights to prevent such mistakes from happening again. By adopting this mindset of turning each failure into a learning lesson or opportunity, you can never fail until you yourself quit.

It is also important to focus on your evolution and don’t compare your journey to anyone else’s. Comparison is the thief of joy and once you try to do things like someone else instead of yourself, you cheat yourself and the world out of a unique experience.

And I will end this blog with another great quote: “Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.” -Winston Churchill

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, keep Glowing…

The A’s of Success: Authenticity & Alignment

Hey Boo!

Have you ever felt as if you are beating your head against a wall? You try time and time again to achieve a goal, but instead you fall short- struggling rather than moving forward and achieving your goals with grace and ease.

You are not alone. The struggle to move from what we don’t want to what we do want is, unfortunately, a fundamental struggle for many individuals. Believe it or not, it is very common for people to struggle against what they want and to actively limit their good. In order to have what you want, you must be willing to end the struggle and move into action. Your success is dependent on your ability to reach your goals and achieve.

The easiest way to move from “stuck” into action without struggle is to be authentic and to be in alignment with your authenticity. Authenticity means that you are connected to your core and that your desires are a true reflection of your inner self and soul.

Alignment means that your entire being is in agreement with the goal you want to achieve.

For example, you come home from work one evening and you are very tired. But this evening is your work-out night. You sit on the couch and actually have to talk yourself into getting into your gym clothes and heading to the gym. What you did in convincing part of yourself to go to the gym when it really wanted to rest on the couch is called alignment. You got yourself into alignment with the idea and intention of going to the gym no matter how tired a part of you felt because you know that working out is for your greater good.

To end struggle and successfully achieve goals, all parts of you must work together for manifestation. That means all bodies, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual, must be in agreement concerning a goal. There can be no doubts, limiting beliefs or attachments. The following describes a process you can use to do an authenticity check concerning your goals and bring yourself into alignment with your goals.

Step One: Sit quietly – create a peaceful, serene and nurturing space for yourself. It must be a space where you feel comfortable and secure. Spend several minutes in quiet and inner reflection upon your goal. Have paper and pen handy.

Step Two: The Authenticity Check: Ask within if this goal is the appropriate goal for you to achieve at this time. If the answer is yes, skip to the next step. If the answer is no, ask what a more appropriate goal would be for you right now.

By asking this question, you move from being ruled by the needs of the mind (survival issues) and begin to access the soul within. You leave behind the petty desires of the ego and move into realizing the desires of the soul. As a result, your goals become truer and more authentic.

Write down the response you receive. If you need additional clarity concerning the response, ask for it. Keep asking within until you feel complete.

Step Three: Alignment. Once you have a defined and authentic goal, it is time to create alignment. Remain in your space of quiet and comfort; ask to speak to your mental body. (You will repeat step Three with each of the bodies) Ask your mental body if it is willing to be in alignment with your goal. The purpose of this question is to uncover any blocks or limitations that reside in the mental body concerning the goal. If the answer is yes, proceed to the next body: physical, spiritual and emotional.

If the answer is no, simply begin a conversation with this part of you. Some questions to begin with are: Why are you not willing to be in alignment with this goal? What would it take for you to be in alignment with this goal? When a part is not willing to be in alignment with an authentic goal, the cause may be fear or insecurity. Usually the situation is remedied by helping the part understand that it is taken care of, that it is safe and that it has nothing to fear. Simply, have a conversation with the part and inform it of the truth. Once you receive the willingness of all the bodies, remember to thank them for supporting the manifestation of this authentic goal. Affirm your alignment with this goal and your intention to manifest it.

By completing this process, you have created an authentic goal and brought yourself into full alignment with this goal. You can now move forward without struggle because all blocks have been removed. Success shall be yours.

Well Boo, I hope that this blog was useful to you. Let me know your thoughts on it, and if you need a bit more help with goal setting and focus feel free to reach out and we can work together to see what possible steps you can take next. My coaching program can help you deprogram limiting thoughts and beliefs and redirect your focus and energy to a more desired outcome.

Until next time beautiful souls, keep glowing…

How to Master the Art of Gratitude to Achieve Success.

Hey Boo!

Gratitude.

I’m sure you have heard this word a million times before and you know that it simply means a feeling of thankfulness and appreciation. Gratitude may seem like an abstract or pointless concept to some, but the act of showing gratitude is actually rather simple and effective to implement. Knowing the power and potential of showing gratitude and subsequently applying it accordingly can be the single most decisive factor in ensuring better degrees of success for yourself.

Let’s dwell a little on exactly what gratitude can do for you and subsequently your success. Gratitude instills a positive feeling in you and the people you show it to. It alters your perspective of negative feelings, thoughts, or beliefs you may have of yourself or others by alerting these feelings, thoughts and beliefs to the things you are grateful for. Gratitude raises your awareness and focus and it can inspire you to achieve better for yourself and the people around you.

Although there are numerous other benefits to showing authentic gratitude, there are many people who neglect to shower themselves or the people around them with it. Instead, they put themselves and others down through criticism and condemnation.

Quick Gratitude Check

Answer the questions below to boost your level of gratitude:

Are there obstacles that are holding you back from showing gratitude to yourself and to others? If so, write them down.

How can you overcome these obstacles?

How actions can you take to unleash an onslaught of gratitude to yourself and to others?

The ‘obstacles’ mentioned above are typically negative thoughts, emotions and beliefs that you may possess that are not only hindering you from showing gratitude but they are likely also hindering you from success.

I use a process to overcome negative thoughts and feelings that I’ll refer to as Question, Debunk, Reaffirm. (I don’t know if it has an official name and I’m not trying to take credit for creating it. I may have read it in a CBT workbook. But it works!) First, I question the validity of the negative thought. Then I debunk the myth or limiting belief responsible for that thought. Next, I reaffirm with a positive new belief to replace the negative one. Questioning the validity (and significance) of your negative thoughts and feelings instead of giving way to them often cause us to realize that we may have been getting all worked up for nothing. Overcoming mental obstacles is a very important topic, however, the chief aim of this blog is to show you the importance of showing gratitude and how you can go about doing it. As such, I will not touch in depth about how to overcome these negative thoughts, emotions and beliefs. But if you would like to find out more, please reach out to me directly. Follow Glow with Mimi on Facebook or join the Resilient Brave Beings private Facebook group.

Now that you are clearer about the benefits of gratitude, let’s first talk about how you can start showing gratitude to yourself. To start doing this, you must first be appreciative of all your achievements – big or small – that you have experienced so far in your life. Ask yourself: when was the last time you actually rewarded yourself for those achievements? If you have constantly been doing so, then good for you and keep it up. If not, then it’s about time you start indulging or pampering yourself with some simple or extravagant (whichever is appropriate) rewards for all your past achievements and future ones.

Next be appreciative of the things you have – your job, home, wealth, health, family, food and surroundings. I know it can be rather impossible to directly show gratitude to these things but no worries. You can list these things in a notebook or journal, and maybe even write down thank you notes for item to express your gratitude. Keep referring to this list when you’re feeling sad or depressed and you can instantly feel a surge of happiness or positive emotions.

So… we’ve covered how you can show gratitude to yourself and the things around you. Now I will touch on how you can show gratitude to the people around you. There are many ways you can express your gratitude to the people around you but I will only list the few I feel are important and simple to perform. Feel free to add your own and implement them as you see fit.

Instead of putting down, insulting and complaining about the people around or working under you, try complementing, praising and appreciating them for all they have done for your well-being and your achievements. By doing this, you gain their respect and trust and they are more likely to continually assist you to achieve better.

Make a thank you list of all the people you are grateful for and constantly refer to this list to give yourself a better and greater feeling.

Give a simple verbal thank you, note of appreciation or even a thank you e-mail to express your gratitude to the people who have assisted you in achievements.

Shower the people you are grateful for with small or big cards, gifts, presents or rewards to clearly show them how much you appreciate them.

Or simply provide the people around you with gifts that cannot be bought with cash like your valuable time, your sacrifice or something that is of utmost importance to you.

Gratitude. Always bear in mind that when you show gratitude to yourself, the things and the people around you, you will definitely hold the key to unlocking your personal growth and ultimately your success.

That’s all I have for you until next Thursday. In the meantime, be authentic, be grateful, and always- keep Glowing…

The Most Powerful Word- No!

Hey Boo!

You ever get tired of saying ‘yes’? Society has set the tone that the default answer to nearly every question is “Yes.” Advertising is all geared towards getting us to say “Yes – I need that.” We phrase our inquiries looking for yes: “Would you like more coffee?” “Would you be interested in joining me for dinner?” “Would you help me move next week?” “Would you mind if I asked you a personal question?” “Do you love me?”

With such a powerful default answer ingrained in us it can be very difficult to say anything else – often leaving us feeling trapped, guilty, or frustrated as a result.

With such an expected and requested default answer “No” becomes one of the most powerful words we can use – if we can manage it! With all the pressure though, overcoming this momentum for “Yes” can be incredibly difficult sometimes.

While it is still very important to make sure we are clear about what we want to say yes to, it is equally important if not more so, to be clear when to say no. Specifically the issue here is to be clear about what is important to you. Yes and no are equally viable and relevant answers in the appropriate circumstances – but may yield dramatically different results.

Saying yes when we really mean no can lead to resentment, frustration, confusion, and dissatisfaction. Understanding and applying the right answer at the right time is super important – but how do we figure it out?

The most important step in figuring out which answer is right is to start off by understanding what is important to you. This can be done with a simple reflection process. Take a moment to slow down and sink into your body. Allow yourself to notice sensations in your body without seeking to change them. Relax and connect with your inner voice of knowledge.

Now ask yourself a few simple questions about issues in your life. Notice how your body reacts. Is it energized? Does your body feel drained or depleted? One of those reactions will occur with Yes and the other with No in response to the question. Typically, the response that energizes us the most is the answer that is most relevant and thus most important to us. All you need to do is notice the response and thus the answer.

So now that we have our Yes/No list of life – how do we apply it? That seems easier said than done sometimes. The reality is it all boils down to the simple issue of honesty. Are you ready, willing and able to be honest first with yourself and then with others? This can be the hardest step as well as the most liberating.

Try out the “no” answer on something small at first. Maybe something as simple as “Would you like more coffee?” or a similar question.

Notice the contentment and satisfaction you feel in giving the honest answer or even just using the word! See where we can begin to apply that answer in ways that feel comfortable and empowering. Notice how your body reacts and feels more alive. Experiment with new questions and new opportunities.

Once you get comfortable with this easier answer comes the hard part – how do you say no to something we already said yes to? While perhaps a bit more uncomfortable it is still the same technique of honesty. When speaking with honesty it is also important to speak with patience, compassion and understanding. Remember that what we are essentially doing is changing the message we have previously communicated. Do not allow guilt or shame to color the communication though. Speak clearly about your decision and the realization to change the answer.

With openness and honesty, we can all speak clearly from our hearts about what is truly yes and truly no. Over time it gets easier, and we have to correct ourselves less and less.

If you find that saying no is especially difficult for you due to a history of people pleasing, then you should attend the From Grieving to Glowing Workshop on 2/24/2024 where we will be discussing anxiety, depression, people pleasing and other effects of narcissistic abuse along with tips on how to combat those effects.

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, could you do two things for me?

Remember that ‘No” is a complete sentence on its own.
Keep Glowing

The Glow Up!

How we can ALL level up this year…

Hello Beautiful Souls!

I know that I’ve been missing in action lately when it comes to the weekly blog, but I have some great news and plans of things to come from Glow with Mimi.

I have been (and still am) furthering my education for the sake of my own personal growth and continued healing, and for the benefit of my readers, followers, and future clients as well. I’ve recently added narcissistic abuse recovery to my growing arsenal and am becoming trauma informed so that I can be as helpful and impactful as possible.

Considering this new information, Glow with Mimi is going through some changes and making some improvements. Here are some things to look out for:

Added/Improved Coaching Programs:

Glow with Mimi’s signature 12 week program (The ‘Inner Glow’ Program) has had some modifications and additions to its material and two program variations were created as well.

Variation 1: Inner Glow Mini

Inner Glow Mini is a 6 week program that covers the core elements of recovery, clarity, and goal setting to get you back on track after an encounter with a narcissist.

Variation 2: Inner Glow Deluxe

Inner Glow Deluxe includes everything from the Inner Glow Complete program along with 3 free additional sessions, weekly accountability check-ins, and VIP listing for discounts of future Glow with Mimi events and/or courses.

There are also three workshops taking place this year.

Workshop #1: From Grieving to Glowing

Informative and empowering workshop discussing the effects of narcissistic abuse as well as some techniques and strategies to heal those effects.

Date: 2/24/2024 12:00pm MST

The effects of narcissistic abuse are anxiety, depression, PTSD (or c-ptsd), loss of self-worth, physical symptoms, inability to forgive yourself, cognitive problems, emotional lability, trust issues, self-destructive habits, people pleasing, and can have effects on the children involved as well. Each of these effects impact our lives and relationships, and even alters the way we think of ourselves.

This workshop could be instrumental to healing the damaging effects of narcissistic abuse so that you can regain your sense of self and start a new and beautiful chapter in your life where you are confident and in control of your life and your world is a stunning reflection of your own self-love and inner glow. Message me for details or register on Eventbrite. Tickets are currently available for 25% off!

*This workshop is not gender specific and is a safe place for all who desire to participate. Anyone being rude or otherwise inappropriate will be promptly removed from the workshop with no refund.

Workshop #2: Anger Management

Not everyone responds to abuse the same way. While the more predictable or expected response to abuse is a timid demeanor and people pleasing behavior, some victims do become angry. When anger is not addressed it gets bottled up and can become very harmful. This workshop will discuss ways to deal with excessive anger.

*This workshop is not gender specific and is a safe place for all who desire to participate. Anyone being rude or otherwise inappropriate will be promptly removed from the workshop with no refund.

Date: TBA

Workshop #3 Toxic Beliefs & People Pleasing

This workshop will be an encore to the workshop that took place in September 2023 and will discuss the damaging beliefs learned during a girl’s upbringing that make her easy prey for narcissists. People pleasing behavior also attracts narcissistic relationships, both romantic and platonic and prevents the people pleaser from being authentic and/or prioritizing themselves which in turn makes them unhappy, resentful, and unfulfilled. The toxic beliefs must be recognized and unlearned with new empowering beliefs being set in their place.

Date: TBA

I am really excited about all the changes that are taking place! That’s all the glow up info that I can share at this time. Follow me on Facebook ( Glow with Mimi / Michelle Sumling) or on Instagram (mimi.sums) to stay up to date with workshop dates, catch live mini sessions when they happen, and get notifications every time a new blog drops.

You can also join my private facebook group Resilient Brave Beings where thought provoking prompts and tips are shared. (I’ve got some great plans for the group too! 😊 )

Much love to you beautiful soul. Until next time, keep glowing…

Stop Waiting on Your Life!

Time is of the Essence, is it not?

Hello Beautiful Souls!

This week I was sitting on the phone with tech support, and over and over again, I thought of things I could have done while I sat there – just waiting. In the past I’d done that- just waited for things to happen instead of taking action to get what I wanted. I used to wait for support, validation, perfection, ‘the right timing’, and sometimes even permission to do things until I realized that I was putting my entire life on hold. What about you?

Are you “on hold” in your life?

Are you waiting for a spouse to come along, waiting on the motivation to get your home organized, waiting on a great job to fall into your lap, waiting to win the lottery so that you could plan your retirement? Stop waiting on your life! The only difference between you and the people who are getting what they want, is that they kept moving and you didn’t. They are not better, stronger, more favored, or more deserving than you are. You just need to get back to it! Here are some ideas to help get you started again.

Focus on the who, not the what

If you find that you’ve been stuck on a goal for a while, try restarting it in “who am I” terms instead of “what I want” terms. For example, instead of saying “I want to lose 30 lbs.”, say “I am someone who takes care of herself by keeping my weight around XXX which is a healthy range for my height and age.” Be as specific as possible. Notice that ‘I want to be someone who helps others’ could mean anything from a clerk in the grocery store to a heart surgeon. Focus on who you want to be. Then ask yourself what actions would fit with your desire “to be” instead of “to get”.

Analyze it

Did you know that a full 80% of your problems come from 20% of your life? It’s true! Determine what that 20% is that’s affecting so much of your life, and start working to make it happier, more efficient, more satisfying.

Assign Value

A big mistake I see in my coaching clients is not assigning a true value to your time, to your energy, to your money, and to your “real estate” (your home or office). Realize that for each thing you say yes to, you have said no to something else. For example: if I say ‘yes’ to listening to my friend gossip about her co-workers for an hour and a half, then I am saying ‘no’ completing my blog or having a coaching session.

Always ask yourself – is this valuable enough to me to crowd my life with, or sacrifice something that I truly want or need?

If you aren’t sure of anything, be sure of this beautiful soul, that you are capable of whatever changes in life you want to make. Stop waiting for change and take action to effect change in your life!

Until Next time, keep Glowing…

Start with a Baseline

Want to Make some Changes but Aren’t sure Where to Start?

Making changes in your life is great and it is the way we grow and develop as people. Change is a constant process and part of being human. When you embark on changing anything in your life, start from where you are. Until you know where that is it would be difficult to effectively make the change. You have to start with a baseline.

Starting with a baseline is about figuring out where you are and what you are doing so that you know exactly what needs to be changed. It may sound odd, but many of us are unaware of what we do. When my clients tell me they want to lose weight the first thing I do is have them keep a food journal for a week just to get a baseline. The next week they share how shocked they were to see not only how much they were eating, but also what they were eating. Many of us are on autopilot and we simply are not aware of what we are doing. When you track it – and this works with anything – you have a real picture of where you are and what needs to change.

I read a statistic once that said most people consistently spend about 10% more than they make. I believe that is true, and it is because what is being spent, especially on a credit card, is not tracked. I once had a client that just didn’t have enough time to accomplish everything she needed to do. When she tracked her time for a week she was made painfully aware that she was spending hours in front of the television. The first step in change is awareness. You have to become aware of what you are doing and exactly where you are before you can proceed forward. Keeping track for a week or two will provide you with valuable information that will support your efforts to change.

Before you embark on any type of change effort you have to know where you are. I liken it to those travel maps that have an X printed next to “You are here.” Until you are aware of exactly where you are – and many of us don’t have a clue – it will be impossible to make the needed change.

The first step in your change effort is to determine where you are. Keep a log for a week or two. This will give you a realistic idea of what you are doing. You can track anything from how much money you spend to how many hours of sleep you get. Once you know the truth about where you are you can proceed.

My coaching program, although primarily focused on narcissistic abuse recovery does provide information and methods to help with focus, time management, goal setting, and accountability.

That’s all I have for this week. Until Next time beautiful souls, keep Glowing!

The Effects of Narcissistic Abuse:

And How to Start Healing from it.

Hello Beautiful Souls!

I wanted to talk to you about the effects of narcissistic abuse both as a confirmation and as a road map. The confirmation is for the survivors of narcissistic abuse- to show them that they aren’t alone and help them understand the effects of the abuse they experienced so that they can take proactive steps towards treatment and healing. The road map is for the family members of narcissistic abuse survivors. It pinpoints the primary effects of narcissistic abuse so that family members and friends can be equipped with insight so that they may offer more thoughtful and knowledge support.

Here are the most common effects of narcissistic abuse:

Anxiety: After experiencing narcissistic abuse, you may experience extreme fear or anxiety in relationships with new people. Anxiety attacks, panic attacks, and hypervigilance may result as well.

Depression: Survivors of narcissistic abuse often struggle with feelings of worthlessness after being manipulated, gaslighted, and devalued over the course of the relationship. Because of this, some of the survivors self-isolate which makes the depression worse.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder: The traumatic events that transpire during a narcissistic relationship can trigger a fight or flight response within you. Anything associated with the memories of abuse can trigger an anxiety attack. Many survivors develop hypervigilance because of narcissistic abuse. Many victims have repeated the sentiment that they ‘never knew’ what their abuser was going to do next.

Lost Sense of Self & Loss of Self Worth: Narcissistic abuse is a form of brainwashing and can destroy your sense of self-worth. The survivor of narcissistic abuse often feels as if they’ve lost themselves. They are no longer the person they were before the relationship began. They begin doubting and second guessing themselves and sometimes have trouble making decisions. This is likely due to being insulted, disregarded, and/or devalued by the narcissist.

Inability to Forgive Yourself: Victims of narcissistic abuse often feel guilt or shame after they are discarded. The mental and emotional manipulation may cause an ‘unworthy’ feeling whether the victim blames themselves for the narcissist’s behavior- believing that they aren’t worthy of love or that they would receive better treatment had they done things differently. In my case, the guilt and shame came from staying as long as I did. I was embarrassed and ashamed that I had allowed another person to treat me that way.

Physical Symptoms: Headaches, stomachaches, difficulty sleeping, nightmares, and body aches have been experienced by many victims of narcissistic abuse. I personally experienced headaches and difficulty sleeping during the marriage as well as shortly after discard.

Cognitive Problems: Memories of traumatic events are known to interfere with concentration and focus. The stress hormones released during narcissistic abuse can cause short term memory loss due to the damage to the hippocampus region of the brain.

Emotional Lability: This can very from mood swings and irritability to being emotionless. The effects of narcissistic abuse can make it challenging to regulate your emotions.

Stuck in a Cycle: This is one of the most dangerous effects in my opinion. Many people find themselves stuck in a cycle where they remain in communication with the abuser after the relationship is over. The connection is kept through various tactics such as threats, manipulation/pity attempts, or hoovering- when they attempt to suck you back into the relationship by love bombing and making promises they don’t intend to keep.

Being stuck in this cycle is dangerous because things often escalate and can become physical. If you are in a situation that is unsafe please get help as quickly and as quietly as you can.

Trust Issues: After experiencing narcissistic abuse your trust levels tend to be quite low. While this is quite understandable, it can hinder the success of future relationships, cause social anxiety, make you overly sensitive to criticism or judgment, and cause an insecure attachment.

People Pleasing: Narcissistic abuse is a perfect learning ground for people pleasing if you weren’t a people pleaser already. Most victims of abuse have grown accustomed to walking on eggshells, avoid confrontation, and may also struggle with expressing emotions or thoughts for fear of being judged. A person who doesn’t express their emotions is often disregarded while the narcissist places their emotions at the forefront for you to focus on.

Self-Destructive Habits: People who have been in relationships with narcissists often engage in self-destructive habits such as alcohol abuse, smoking, food or drug addiction, and overspending. Some believe that this is because the victim feels at fault for the narcissistic partner’s behavior toward them. I personally believe that this behavior may be the victim’s attempt to numb the pain of the abuse. In either case, it is highly encouraged that you find a coping mechanism that builds you up instead of tearing you down.

**How to Heal from Narcissistic Abuse**

Recognize and Accept Your Feelings

Feelings such as grief, depression, anger, and anxiety are completely normal feelings to have. Your feelings are valid and it’s important not to suppress your emotions and you should definitely not judge yourself for feeling them.

Educate Yourself

Learn about narcissistic traits and behaviors to more easily recognize when you are being manipulated, and self-check to unearth any internal programming or beliefs you may have for a narcissist to use against you. For more information on those internal programmings or toxic beliefs, you can check out my ebook on Amazon entitled Toxic Beliefs: The Beginning of Internal Destruction.

Join a Support Group

You may find it therapeutic to interact with others who understand exactly what you’re going through and can offer tips and advice to help you cope. You are more than welcome to join my growing facebook group Resilient Brave Beings for a safe space to ask questions and express your concerns.

Reach Out to a Therapist, Counselor, or Coach

A qualified professional can equip you with tools to cope with and heal from narcissistic abuse in a safe and nonjudgmental space. Sign up for my informative workshop where we will be discussing the effects of narcissistic abuse and some strategies to help your healing process.

Practice Self Care

When your self-esteem has taken a hit it’s easy to feel unmotivated and undeserving of good things. But you deserve the utmost love and care. Adequate sleep, healthy food, and engaging in activities that you enjoy are all heavily encouraged.

Narcissistic abuse can be a difficult thing to recover from, but with education, support, encouragement, and strategy healing is possible.

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog this week. I do hope that it was helpful to you.

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, keep Glowing…