The Power of Positive Thinking

Hey Boo!

Have you ever wonder how super-successful people become super- successful? Is it privilege, or luck? Or, is it possible that the world’s greatest achievers think completely differently from the majority?

Do you think the Wright brothers could ever have achieved what they did if they hadn’t believed it could be done? What about Simone Biles or Sha’Carri Richardson? How different would their stories be had they let negative words or thoughts decide their fate?

Success in any aspect of life (financial, professional, romantic, etc.) is neither achieved or maintained in a state of negativity. Think of your thoughts as seeds- you can’t grow a positive outcome from negative thoughts.

I myself have been in the company of negative thinkers and let me tell you that their influence if allowed to go unchecked is very powerful and destructive. Look at what happens if you place a piece of rotting fruit in a bowl of fresh fruit. All of the surrounding fruit begins to rot as well. This is why it is paramount that if you want to be successful in life, you must surround yourself with positive thinking individuals and to share your positive thoughts and attitudes with likeminded people.

It is also equally important that you write your goals down and place them in a position where you can see and read them on a daily basis.

In the late 1950’s, 1500 students at Yale University were sent a questionnaire covering various parts of the college experience. Here are the last two questions:

1) Do you have an ambition in your life?

2) Have you written it down?

Twenty-five years later, a postgraduate decided to carry out further research on the last two questions. Here are the results of his findings.

Over 75% of the students who completed the questionnaire had ambitions for their lives.

Only 3.3% had actually written their ambitions down.

After tracking down as many of the 3.3% (51 students) as he could, he found that all of them had gone on to realize their dreams – in commerce, in government and in the professions.

Of the others he had managed to contact, (the ones who didn’t write their ambitions down) they told him that most of what they had achieved had happened more by chance than design. They had ended up in careers they hadn’t planned for because they didn’t define what it was they were actually seeking to do. Is it safe to say that by writing your goals down you are actively programming or reprogramming your brain to change the way you subconsciously perceive?

Not having been party to the experiment which was carried out at YALE, I can neither confirm or deny it. But I do believe in the strength of being intentional and the power of positive thinking.

Until next time, beautiful souls keep glowing…

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You Made Me Who I am Today, But if I Never Saw You Again it Would be Too Soon.

Hey Boo!

For this week’s blog, I thought I’d do something different. A week or so ago, I saw a post from a content creator expressing love and gratitude to the person who helped them elevate to their current level of being. It brought me joy to see the post, but it also caused me to reflect on the person who made me who I am today and that’s not quite as joyful a story. I want to share some of my story with you in the form of a letter. Here goes:

Dear “Deion”,

A lot has happened since we last spoke. It’s been over two years since we’ve had any communication at all, and I know that’s not what you wanted, but it’s what I needed. I blocked you on social media, changed my number and stopped responding to your e-mails because it was clear that you were still unwilling to claim any responsibility for the way our marriage fell apart. My jaw hit the floor when I read your line about how ‘if anyone was afraid, it should be you’. I was amazed and appalled, especially since it was me who was threatened with a steel pipe and chased away from my home on foot.

I won’t mince words- our marriage was a complete disaster. From the very beginning you weren’t honest about who you were. You lied about your age, how many children you had, and your criminal history just to name a few things. The thing about that is if you were honest from the beginning, I may have still given you a chance. I thought you were a decent guy and my heart went out to you as you talked about the women in your past and how they’d done you wrong. I had experienced similar hurt and betrayal and just wanted someone I could love freely who would reciprocate. I thought that I’d found that in you. But I couldn’t have been more wrong.

You looked me in my eyes as I shared my pain, vulnerabilities, and fears and you vowed to be different. And I guess you didn’t lie because you were different. You turned out to be much worse than anything I’d encountered before.

The first few months were blissful. You were caring, thoughtful, and attentive. You looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen in your life. You told me that you’d never met a woman like me, and you appreciated all of the things that I did for you out of love. You said you loved everything about me- how I dressed and presented myself, my intelligence and personality, even my goals and aspirations. I had written and self-published a book and you had offered to help me promote it on social media. I was so happy to be your wife. I would’ve went to the ends of the earth for you because I loved you. And you loved me too, right?

Wrong.

After the first few months, I never saw the man I married again. Your representative had disappeared, and I was left with something that you had actually never shared with me, your true self. You started complaining about the very things you claimed to love and understand. We began to fight a lot and I made changes to keep the peace. You didn’t want me working, so I quit. You felt like social media was causing problems in our marriage, so I disconnected. I changed how I dressed so that you wouldn’t think I was ‘trying to look good for someone else’. Essentially, I tried to become everything you wanted me to be. But even that wasn’t enough. Every time I met your expectations, you created new ones for me to meet. As I put in more effort, you put in even less. The fighting increased and intensified to the point of exhaustion. Sometimes things got physical, and let’s not forget the night you could’ve ended both of our lives.

It may seem like I’m trying to dump all of the blame on you, but I’m not. Although youdid a lot of very hurtful things to me, it was I who allowed them. I take responsibility for my lack of self-esteem, poor boundaries, and codependency. I acknowledge that there were red flags that I ignored because I was already so convinced that you were the one. I made excuses for you and dismissed things that I shouldn’t have.

During the course of our marriage, I gained over 60 pounds, struggled with bouts of depression and ptsd, and experienced multiple lupus flares due to stress. I was stifled, isolated, and miserable.

Outside of the passing of my parents, our marriage was one of the most painful experiences of my life. I’d never felt so broken, so worthless, so low. But it was also one of the most impactful. Because when you hit rock bottom, there’s nowhere to go but UP. And that’s what I did. From the trauma and pain I was able to heal and rise like a phoenix from the ashes.

And in some way, I have you to thank for that. The truth is, you helped make me the person I am today but if I never saw you again it would be too soon. I don’t wish you any harm and I truly hope that you are able to heal from your wounds and find peace. Because that’s what I was able to do and it’s absolutely blissful. Not perfect but blissful.

Goodbye “Deion”, and good luck.

Well, that’s all I have for this week beautiful souls. Until next time, keep Glowing…

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Experiencing Inner Peace

Hey Boo!

Inner Peace, isn’t that what we’d all love to experience consistently as we weave our paths through everything life gives us? The good news is it is far simpler to attain than many of our outer (material or physical) goals. The bad news is that simple isn’t always easy! Attaining inner peace is not easy because it means replacing old habits with new, and that requires dedicated commitment. But the benefits are absolutely worth the effort.

Inner peace gives you the ability to live your life with a sense of happiness, satisfaction and fulfillment which is not disturbed or influenced by outside events. How do you acquire it? By living your life your own way, not how others think you should. By not worrying about what others think of you – we all judge others (both positively and negatively) according to our own values, but if we try to live our lives in a way which honors somebody else’s values rather than our own, we’ll always have a little gnawing discomfort going on deep inside.

To experience inner peace, we also need to be able to forgive and to let go of guilt. Forgive yourself and forgive others. Feeling guilty about past actions won’t change them and won’t make anybody feel any better (either the offended or the offender). Do what you can to make things right, make a clear and distinct decision to do better in the future and move on.

Letting go of anger or grudges will also bring about a surprising sense of peace. Think about it – how does holding onto these negative emotions help you? And do you think they hurt those against whom you hold them more than they hurt you? Not at all. In most situations, the person that’s hurt you has moved on and is enjoying life-completely oblivious to how you feel. We must take both responsibility and control of our emotions because no matter who we believe caused them they only truly affect us.

Of course, it can be very difficult to forgive someone who’s hurt you, but what I’ve come to realize is that most people don’t maliciously set out to hurt others, and those who do are deeply unhappy themselves. The motivation behind their action was most probably some kind of fear rather than deliberately wanting to cause hurt or pain. And thought of in that context, it’s easier to let it go and move forward.

And with a little bit of practice at forgiveness, you may even find yourself getting less annoyed or angry with people in future. When you can shrug things off and not take things personally (it’s really about them, and not you at all), you’ll have a greater sense of inner peace. Our happiness is determined by how we think about the events in our lives, rather than by the events themselves. Take charge of your thoughts and you take charge of your emotions.

To achieve inner peace, you also need to let go of worry. This does take work but, it’s definitely worth the effort. Worry is similar to guilt. Worrying about what might or might not happen is completely unproductive, and totally destroys your ability to enjoy the present moment. A great shame that would be, as the present moment is all we really have.

So, how do we learn to let go of worries, guilt and anger? Well, the first thing is to become consciously aware of what we’re thinking whenever we feel worried, guilty or angry. Notice what’s going on in your inner dialogue, and acknowledge that it’s your thoughts about the external event that’s causing you to feel the way you do, and not the event itself. Then reframe your thoughts to reflect what’s going on around you in a more positive light. Whenever you catch yourself thinking the old thought, banish it immediately and replace it with the new one.

“No-one can create negativity or stress within you. Only you can do that by virtue of how you process your world.” — Dr Wayne Dyer

This will take a lot of practice but with patience and persistence you will develop a lighter inner dialogue that promotes a feeling of well-being and inner peace, and the world will feel like a far better place to live in!

Until Next time beautiful souls, keep Glowing…

3 Steps to Discovering Your Purpose

Hey Boo!

Do you ever wonder, what’s my purpose? What really is the point of it all?

Determining what our purpose is in life can be one of the hardest questions that we as humans must try to answer. In this blog we will be going through a step by step process, exploring your feelings and options, and by the end, you should have a fairly solid tool you can immediately employ in your life, to help give it a meaningful direction!

There are three steps to the process of discovering the purpose of your life:

Understanding the principle of choice
Creating your “underlying principle”
Aligning your life with this underlying principle

Understanding The Principle of Choice

Norman Vincent Peale has this to say about the power of choice. “The greatest power we have is the power of choice. It is an actual fact, that if you have been groping under unhappiness, you can choose to be joyous, instead. And, by effort, lift yourself into joy. If you tend to be fearful, you can overcome that misery by choosing to have courage. The whole trend and the quality of anyone’s life is determined by the choices that are made”.

“Choosing” is the most important activity of your mind, because by making a choice, you are proclaiming your desires to your subconscious mind. Once the subconscious mind gets to know your desires, it is going to do anything to manifest them in your life. The choices you make in your life become your goal. And, if you are sincere in pursuing them, there is no reason why you should not accomplish them.

Indecision, on the other hand, not only creates frustration and anxiety, but can also confuses the subconscious mind about what you want. But it is important that the choices you make are made by you, in accordance with your true desires, purposes and aptitude. A lot of us let others make choices for us or make our choices according to what we think is ‘correct’, even if that means going against our own wishes. What is right for someone else may not be right for you, and the way to know this is listening to what your heart says.

So, to begin with, make a list of things which interest you; things which you have always enjoyed, which make you feel better, which inspire you to press forward, no matter what obstacles you face. Do you like doing something creative, or something artistic? Do you enjoy nature? Do you like the sea? Do you enjoy helping others? Do you get pleasure out of making a difference in other people’s lives?

Whatever it is that interests you, write it down and answer these questions:

What thing do you love to do?

What is it that you love about this thing and why?

How could you do this for money, and make a living out of it?

Creating Your Underlying Principle

The next step is to examine the list you just made and find out if there is any recurring theme. Maybe, it is contribution that keeps coming up, or a desire to seek or give love, to feed the hungry, or help the elderly cope with old age. Whatever it is, try to identify the central theme of the things you love to do, and try to put it in a short and precise statement. This will be your ‘Mission Statement’. It may even be a quote by a famous person, or a philosophy that has influenced you. Of course, as you grow up, this statement could evolve, but its soul will remain the same. Now, write down your Mission Statement.

Aligning Your LIFE With Your Underlying Principle

The final step in this journey is to map your path to your ultimate purpose and to begin implementing changes that help to align your daily life with your underlying purpose. Take a moment to brainstorm on the little things that you can do right now to cultivate the energy and environment you want to be in. By making these little changes in your lifestyle, you will be able to begin living this principle out each and every day. It might take a few days, but by becoming aware and intentional of this underlying principle of your life, you will certainly start to feel the difference in your enthusiasm for life as a whole. If you realize that you love being amidst nature, plan out vacations and outings. Maybe an outing with your children or friends can be the start as you create even more ways to get into the environment that helps you thrive most. If you discover that you enjoy helping those in need, start to look for opportunities to volunteer in your community. On the other hand, you might even want to change your job, or start a new business that is more in line with your mission.

Whatever it is that you desire to do, know that it is in you to do- or else you wouldn’t have had the idea or desire in the first place.

So, there you have it! By following along with the steps outlined above, you will be on your way to finding and living out your purpose. And, as you go through this process, just remember, “You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it courageously.” – Steve Maraboli

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, keep Glowing…

The Ultimate Success Formula

Hey Boo!

Do you know what it takes to be successful?

I’m sure that if you ask around, you will find different definitions of success and different answers to the formula of success. The truth is, success leaves clues and you can achieve success in the area you desire by observing the common qualities and principles. They are simple and considered to be common sense but many people simply do not follow them.

Let me share with you one of my favorite quotes:

“There are no secrets to success. It is the results of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure.” -Colin Powell

As stated in that quote, there are three key factors to achieve massive success in your life:

Preparation

You don’t have to wait for everything to be perfect. Start with the first step and keep moving. Success doesn’t happen overnight. Prepare, prepare, prepare. You must be ready to receive the success you desire. Set your sight to the destination that you want to achieve, then work and prepare for the moment when the opportunity knocks your door. As one of my mentors once said to me, “it’s better to be prepared and not have the opportunity than to have the opportunity and not be prepared.”

Hard Work

Success needs hard work. Don’t listen to these ‘get rich quick’ schemes. You need to build your character and work hard on yourself and your business to achieve greatness. By ‘hard work’ what I mean is consistent, intentional work. Do the right things and do them in the right way. Don’t procrastinate. Take bold actions. Work with determination to craft your legacy.

Learning from failure

Successful people do not see failures as failures. They see them as important learning lessons. Lessons that are capable of giving them insights to prevent such mistakes from happening again. By adopting this mindset of turning each failure into a learning lesson or opportunity, you can never fail until you yourself quit.

It is also important to focus on your evolution and don’t compare your journey to anyone else’s. Comparison is the thief of joy and once you try to do things like someone else instead of yourself, you cheat yourself and the world out of a unique experience.

And I will end this blog with another great quote: “Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.” -Winston Churchill

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, keep Glowing…

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The Art of Achievement

Hey Boo!

Ever wondered how some people have everything that they dream of, but for the vast majority it just remains a dream? Here are some tips on how to help turn your dreams into reality. Fortunately, it’s not a question of genetics or luck; it’s down to the thinking strategies that we use.

Step One: Understanding What is Important to You

Knowing what matters most to you is the first and most vital step toward achievement. Without the understanding of what’s important to you, you’re just spinning wheels. Take a moment to think about what really is important to you. In fact, take out a pen and paper and write it down. What are your priorities? What are you passionate about? What are your values and how do they impact what your goals are? Do your goals and your values align?

If we have a greater understanding of our values, craft our goals in line with them, and address some of the other key areas listed here, we are rewarded with the energy and motivation to make them happen – with ease.

Now, having considered that, what goals do you have listed that coincide with your values? Take those goals and move on to step two.

Step Two: Optimize the Use of Your Time

The first step in optimizing the use of our time is understanding what’s important. Since we’ve done that in step one, we will now move on to step two which is distinguishing the importance of our activities.

To optimize the use of your time so that you can achieve your goals and earn the life you want you must spend time doing things that bring you closer to achievement. Take a moment to write down the steps that are necessary to accomplish the goal that you wrote down in step one. If you’re not quite sure what the next steps are, here are some questions to get you brainstorming:

Does your goal have a specific location? If so, how will you travel there?

Does your goal require certifications, degrees, licenses, funding? If so, how will you go about acquiring these things?

Does your goal have a certain time frame? If so, how can you break down the tasks in a way that makes the goal achievable within your time frame?

Once you’ve written down the steps you need to take to achieve your goal, dedicate a consistent amount of time doing things that bring you closer to achieving your desires. For example, if your goal is to lose 30 lbs in 3 months then you may aim to lose 10 lbs each month. Perhaps your steps would be to exercise a certain amount of times per week and eat a certain amount of calories per day. Optimizing the use of your time in this case may be you choosing to do a 30 minute workout instead of watching an episode of your favorite show.

What optimizing the use of your time, ask yourself this question- Are my current actions conducive to the goal I want to accomplish, or the person that I’m meant to be?

*Disclaimer: this is in no way a suggestion that you become a robotic worker-drone who never has fun and is focused on goals 24 hours a day. This is simply to state that consistent steps should be taken, and that sacrificing a momentarily enjoyable experience to invest in more lasting joy and fulfillment is heavenly encouraged.

To optimize the use of your time, it may be helpful to place the steps on a calendar so that you can schedule your tasks.

Step Three: Start with What You have Now, with the End in Mind

Having both established goals that are in line with your values and optimized your time, you now need to get started. It’s important that the start is made with the goal in mind and with a degree of realism on the resources that are available now. Accept the flaws and errors that may occur and understand that you don’t have to be perfect to start. I repeat- do not expect perfection or uber-success at your first effort.

It’s important not to be delusional on this step. Delusion is the result of setting off without a realistic view of what the present situation is or how challenging the task may actually be. And Delusion soon turns to disappointment which in turn turns to frustration and ultimately little or no significant progress. At the end of the day we only have 3 resources: Physical and mental energy, time and money. It’s key that we learn how to make optimal use of these resources.

Step Four: Meeting Challenges

The first three steps should have you well on your way to goal achievement, but no amount of planning is going to account for every eventuality. Sometimes there are unplanned events and occurrences beyond your control. Many people consider these unplanned events to be problems that prevent progress and give up at that point. But people that achieve are not put off by these events and are more energized by the richness of the opportunities that are enveloped in these events. An unforeseen event can be an opportunity for growth and improvement, or even a detour leading you to a greater outcome than you expected. With the right mindset the journey to achievement can be viewed as one opportunity after another to reinforce the ability to succeed.

Consider This: How You Use Your Imagination

All human beings are blessed with incredibly powerful imaginations. However, many imagine outcomes of the future that are not going to be to their advantage. Imagining negative outcomes leads to worry, stress and fear and drains our energy and motivation. Imagining a positive outcome of the future releases more of the energy and motivation that we need to succeed at our goals. Fortunately, the structure that we use in our minds is the same for both negative and positive imaginations. And with the right know-how you can use your fear to generate excitement and anticipation.

Forming Your Goals Well

When forming your goals it is essential to consider a number of factors; a compelling view of how things will be when the goal is achieved is as important as a clear understanding of what we will lose when we it’s achieved. Many times, the likely loss prevents us from achieving what we want because we have not adapted our thinking around the loss. A prime example of this is giving up smoking – many people fail to give up because having a cigarette provides them with a valuable 5-minute break. When the break is factored into the future along with the goal the chances of success are considerably increased. Although the extra time away from your workstation may seem like quite the reward, consider the health risks and dangers associated with smoking and weigh them against the benefits. When forming your goals it is important that the benefits of accomplishing the goal are clearly understood- and that they outweigh the benefits of not accomplishing the goal. (In this case the extra breaks and stress relief.)

Believe That it is Possible For You

Many people hold negative beliefs about whether the goal is achievable, whether they will ever achieve it and even whether it is really for them. It is important to overcome these beliefs or sabotage will continuously result. Fortunately, our beliefs can be changed as we are not born with limiting beliefs, and they don’t have to be accepted as your reality. As long as you set goals that align with your values, optimize the use of your time by taking consistent steps forward, and believe in yourself emphatically- you can achieve your goals.

What goal are you crushing next? I know you can do it!

Until Next Time Beautiful Souls, keep Glowing…

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The A’s of Success: Authenticity & Alignment

Hey Boo!

Have you ever felt as if you are beating your head against a wall? You try time and time again to achieve a goal, but instead you fall short- struggling rather than moving forward and achieving your goals with grace and ease.

You are not alone. The struggle to move from what we don’t want to what we do want is, unfortunately, a fundamental struggle for many individuals. Believe it or not, it is very common for people to struggle against what they want and to actively limit their good. In order to have what you want, you must be willing to end the struggle and move into action. Your success is dependent on your ability to reach your goals and achieve.

The easiest way to move from “stuck” into action without struggle is to be authentic and to be in alignment with your authenticity. Authenticity means that you are connected to your core and that your desires are a true reflection of your inner self and soul.

Alignment means that your entire being is in agreement with the goal you want to achieve.

For example, you come home from work one evening and you are very tired. But this evening is your work-out night. You sit on the couch and actually have to talk yourself into getting into your gym clothes and heading to the gym. What you did in convincing part of yourself to go to the gym when it really wanted to rest on the couch is called alignment. You got yourself into alignment with the idea and intention of going to the gym no matter how tired a part of you felt because you know that working out is for your greater good.

To end struggle and successfully achieve goals, all parts of you must work together for manifestation. That means all bodies, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual, must be in agreement concerning a goal. There can be no doubts, limiting beliefs or attachments. The following describes a process you can use to do an authenticity check concerning your goals and bring yourself into alignment with your goals.

Step One: Sit quietly – create a peaceful, serene and nurturing space for yourself. It must be a space where you feel comfortable and secure. Spend several minutes in quiet and inner reflection upon your goal. Have paper and pen handy.

Step Two: The Authenticity Check: Ask within if this goal is the appropriate goal for you to achieve at this time. If the answer is yes, skip to the next step. If the answer is no, ask what a more appropriate goal would be for you right now.

By asking this question, you move from being ruled by the needs of the mind (survival issues) and begin to access the soul within. You leave behind the petty desires of the ego and move into realizing the desires of the soul. As a result, your goals become truer and more authentic.

Write down the response you receive. If you need additional clarity concerning the response, ask for it. Keep asking within until you feel complete.

Step Three: Alignment. Once you have a defined and authentic goal, it is time to create alignment. Remain in your space of quiet and comfort; ask to speak to your mental body. (You will repeat step Three with each of the bodies) Ask your mental body if it is willing to be in alignment with your goal. The purpose of this question is to uncover any blocks or limitations that reside in the mental body concerning the goal. If the answer is yes, proceed to the next body: physical, spiritual and emotional.

If the answer is no, simply begin a conversation with this part of you. Some questions to begin with are: Why are you not willing to be in alignment with this goal? What would it take for you to be in alignment with this goal? When a part is not willing to be in alignment with an authentic goal, the cause may be fear or insecurity. Usually the situation is remedied by helping the part understand that it is taken care of, that it is safe and that it has nothing to fear. Simply, have a conversation with the part and inform it of the truth. Once you receive the willingness of all the bodies, remember to thank them for supporting the manifestation of this authentic goal. Affirm your alignment with this goal and your intention to manifest it.

By completing this process, you have created an authentic goal and brought yourself into full alignment with this goal. You can now move forward without struggle because all blocks have been removed. Success shall be yours.

Well Boo, I hope that this blog was useful to you. Let me know your thoughts on it, and if you need a bit more help with goal setting and focus feel free to reach out and we can work together to see what possible steps you can take next. My coaching program can help you deprogram limiting thoughts and beliefs and redirect your focus and energy to a more desired outcome.

Until next time beautiful souls, keep glowing…

The Power of A Dream

Hey Boo!

Some time ago, I spoke to a Youth Leadership Group at a conference, and I was deeply inspired listening to the dreams that the teenagers had for the future. While I was presenting, I felt the group of teens begin to realize that it is ok to dream and be proud of what you have done in your life, and where you want to go in life.

As adults, we need to realize that the power of a dream will enable you to achieve whatever your ultimate “WHY” in life is. By the age of 35, most people lose all of their dreams and fall into a rut. From the age of 25-65, people generally go back and forth to work and say to themselves,” I wish…if only I could have…if only I knew then what I know now,” and numerous other lamentations expressing that they do not feel fulfilled in life. The key in life tofeeling fulfilled is to simply listen to your inner spirit and make your daily work in life something that you love to do and will help you achieve your dreams.

The key word in that sentence is dreams! Too many people when asked, “Where do you see yourself 2-5 years from now” give the answer, “Just let me make it through the weekend.” The underlying reason that they don’t know where they are going to be is because they have no dreams. This can be extremely frightening! Most of the teenagers that I spoke to at the conference had dreams for their life and where they see themselves in the future. As a life coach, my ultimate goal is to empower people to find their WHY in life — to catapult them to attain their dreams.

I also spoke to the group about how important it is to be around a mastermind team, which will push you on and let you know it is awesome that you have a dream. As an overall population, the majority of adults (somewhere around 95%) have no mastermind team or solid support system. They do, however, have a group of so-called friends who will tell every reason why they should never try to win and to just accept their life. But do you really want to concede to a life of mediocrity? Of course not! You need to stop right now and take a personal inventory of your life and ask yourself three life-changing questions:

1) WHAT is my WHY in life? (Why am I getting up each and every day?)

2) WHO is my Mastermind Team?

3) WHERE do I see myself 2-5 years from now?

When you answer these questions you need to be tell yourself the truth because the truth shall set you FREE! The key to living a fulfilled life is waking up each day with a driving desire to achieve your “WHY”. The key to winning in life is to be part of a winning team and realize life decisions are challenging but very beneficial. Bring your Dreams back to life!

Until next time Beautiful Soul, keep Glowing…

How to Master the Art of Gratitude to Achieve Success.

Hey Boo!

Gratitude.

I’m sure you have heard this word a million times before and you know that it simply means a feeling of thankfulness and appreciation. Gratitude may seem like an abstract or pointless concept to some, but the act of showing gratitude is actually rather simple and effective to implement. Knowing the power and potential of showing gratitude and subsequently applying it accordingly can be the single most decisive factor in ensuring better degrees of success for yourself.

Let’s dwell a little on exactly what gratitude can do for you and subsequently your success. Gratitude instills a positive feeling in you and the people you show it to. It alters your perspective of negative feelings, thoughts, or beliefs you may have of yourself or others by alerting these feelings, thoughts and beliefs to the things you are grateful for. Gratitude raises your awareness and focus and it can inspire you to achieve better for yourself and the people around you.

Although there are numerous other benefits to showing authentic gratitude, there are many people who neglect to shower themselves or the people around them with it. Instead, they put themselves and others down through criticism and condemnation.

Quick Gratitude Check

Answer the questions below to boost your level of gratitude:

Are there obstacles that are holding you back from showing gratitude to yourself and to others? If so, write them down.

How can you overcome these obstacles?

How actions can you take to unleash an onslaught of gratitude to yourself and to others?

The ‘obstacles’ mentioned above are typically negative thoughts, emotions and beliefs that you may possess that are not only hindering you from showing gratitude but they are likely also hindering you from success.

I use a process to overcome negative thoughts and feelings that I’ll refer to as Question, Debunk, Reaffirm. (I don’t know if it has an official name and I’m not trying to take credit for creating it. I may have read it in a CBT workbook. But it works!) First, I question the validity of the negative thought. Then I debunk the myth or limiting belief responsible for that thought. Next, I reaffirm with a positive new belief to replace the negative one. Questioning the validity (and significance) of your negative thoughts and feelings instead of giving way to them often cause us to realize that we may have been getting all worked up for nothing. Overcoming mental obstacles is a very important topic, however, the chief aim of this blog is to show you the importance of showing gratitude and how you can go about doing it. As such, I will not touch in depth about how to overcome these negative thoughts, emotions and beliefs. But if you would like to find out more, please reach out to me directly. Follow Glow with Mimi on Facebook or join the Resilient Brave Beings private Facebook group.

Now that you are clearer about the benefits of gratitude, let’s first talk about how you can start showing gratitude to yourself. To start doing this, you must first be appreciative of all your achievements – big or small – that you have experienced so far in your life. Ask yourself: when was the last time you actually rewarded yourself for those achievements? If you have constantly been doing so, then good for you and keep it up. If not, then it’s about time you start indulging or pampering yourself with some simple or extravagant (whichever is appropriate) rewards for all your past achievements and future ones.

Next be appreciative of the things you have – your job, home, wealth, health, family, food and surroundings. I know it can be rather impossible to directly show gratitude to these things but no worries. You can list these things in a notebook or journal, and maybe even write down thank you notes for item to express your gratitude. Keep referring to this list when you’re feeling sad or depressed and you can instantly feel a surge of happiness or positive emotions.

So… we’ve covered how you can show gratitude to yourself and the things around you. Now I will touch on how you can show gratitude to the people around you. There are many ways you can express your gratitude to the people around you but I will only list the few I feel are important and simple to perform. Feel free to add your own and implement them as you see fit.

Instead of putting down, insulting and complaining about the people around or working under you, try complementing, praising and appreciating them for all they have done for your well-being and your achievements. By doing this, you gain their respect and trust and they are more likely to continually assist you to achieve better.

Make a thank you list of all the people you are grateful for and constantly refer to this list to give yourself a better and greater feeling.

Give a simple verbal thank you, note of appreciation or even a thank you e-mail to express your gratitude to the people who have assisted you in achievements.

Shower the people you are grateful for with small or big cards, gifts, presents or rewards to clearly show them how much you appreciate them.

Or simply provide the people around you with gifts that cannot be bought with cash like your valuable time, your sacrifice or something that is of utmost importance to you.

Gratitude. Always bear in mind that when you show gratitude to yourself, the things and the people around you, you will definitely hold the key to unlocking your personal growth and ultimately your success.

That’s all I have for you until next Thursday. In the meantime, be authentic, be grateful, and always- keep Glowing…

Start with a Baseline

Want to Make some Changes but Aren’t sure Where to Start?

Making changes in your life is great and it is the way we grow and develop as people. Change is a constant process and part of being human. When you embark on changing anything in your life, start from where you are. Until you know where that is it would be difficult to effectively make the change. You have to start with a baseline.

Starting with a baseline is about figuring out where you are and what you are doing so that you know exactly what needs to be changed. It may sound odd, but many of us are unaware of what we do. When my clients tell me they want to lose weight the first thing I do is have them keep a food journal for a week just to get a baseline. The next week they share how shocked they were to see not only how much they were eating, but also what they were eating. Many of us are on autopilot and we simply are not aware of what we are doing. When you track it – and this works with anything – you have a real picture of where you are and what needs to change.

I read a statistic once that said most people consistently spend about 10% more than they make. I believe that is true, and it is because what is being spent, especially on a credit card, is not tracked. I once had a client that just didn’t have enough time to accomplish everything she needed to do. When she tracked her time for a week she was made painfully aware that she was spending hours in front of the television. The first step in change is awareness. You have to become aware of what you are doing and exactly where you are before you can proceed forward. Keeping track for a week or two will provide you with valuable information that will support your efforts to change.

Before you embark on any type of change effort you have to know where you are. I liken it to those travel maps that have an X printed next to “You are here.” Until you are aware of exactly where you are – and many of us don’t have a clue – it will be impossible to make the needed change.

The first step in your change effort is to determine where you are. Keep a log for a week or two. This will give you a realistic idea of what you are doing. You can track anything from how much money you spend to how many hours of sleep you get. Once you know the truth about where you are you can proceed.

My coaching program, although primarily focused on narcissistic abuse recovery does provide information and methods to help with focus, time management, goal setting, and accountability.

That’s all I have for this week. Until Next time beautiful souls, keep Glowing!